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Asher's P.O.V.

Over the weekend I told Carson and Will all about what happened and they were obviously happy that she kissed me but Carson made fun of me because I wimped out when I was gonna kiss her.

But when I got to school I went right to the library because they have the yearbooks there and I went and got last years one.

I flipped through the pages to the sports teams and found the dance team and looked to see that there were 6 different teams at our school.

"What the hell?" I said to myself. I didn't think that it was such a popular sport. I looked at the photos of the girls and none of them looked like my girl.

I gritted my teeth and slammed the book shut and walked out annoyed and went to chemistry.

When I got there my lab partner Holly walked in and sat next to me. "Hi Asher." She said smiling.

"Hey." I said smiling back.

Holly is a cheerleader but she's not a total bitchy one and she a lesbian so she hangs out with me because she enjoys my company and not because she wants to be with me which is refreshing for a girl who just wants to be friends.

"So, did you take my advice?" She asked.

"Yeah, did not rinse and repeat I just rinsed." I said giving her a thumbs up.

"And the result?" She asked and I dropped my head down a little and she ran her fingers through my hair and said, "Very nice."

"Yup, and it'll save a fortune on shampoo." I said chuckling and she smiled.

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"Did you looked at each girl closely?" Carson asked.

"Yeah, but I don't know what she originally looks like so how am I supposed to tell what color her eyes are in a three by five inch pixilated picture." I said pissed.

"Well, lets just go spy on the dance practices and see if you can tell who she is." Will suggested.

"I'm not gonna go and look two dozen girls in the eyes like some kinda cop looking to see if someone's drunk." I said rolling my eyes.

"Why not?" Carson asked. "Girl love when you look at them." He said making me shove him a little chuckling.

"Shut up." I said.

"Well, their practice is starting now so we gonna spy or not?" Will asked.

"Yeah," I said and we ran up to the English classroom and over to the window that gives a great view of the dance field.

"Okay, so is that her? Or that one? Maybe that one!" Carson kept on saying making me roll my eyes.

"I can't see them dickhead." I said and hit him in the arm.

I squinted my eyes trying to get a good look at lease one one they all kept on moving kinda fast like ants, wait, no that's a bad simile.

This is so fucking annoying!

"I told you this was stupid." I said walking out of the room.

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It's now Wednesday and I still call her every night and we text in the morning and I still say I wants to meet her but don't push it because I don't want to make her uncomfortable but I do tease her about kissing me that night but not in a dick way.

But I think I tease her because I want know how she would react to it so I can find out how she feels about it so I can find out her friend group. Like if she's confident about it then she would hang out with the drama kids or year book and if not she'd be more in the outcasts who don't want to be popular.

Right now it's lunch and I'm at my normal table with the guys and a few cheerleaders and one of them Ava is sitting uncomfortably close to me and I don't want to be rude but I've been sliding away from her slightly for the last two minutes and she seems to keep getting closer to me.

And my phone started ringing, thank god, and I said, "Sorry, I gotta take this." And walked away out to the hall. I looked to see that it was her and I smiled.

"Hey, what are you doing calling me during school? I'm I that much of a bad influence on you?" I asked chuckling.

"No, i-it's just," She started to say and I immediately stood up a little straighter. Her voice was shaky and it cracked a little. She was obviously upset.

"Hey, hey, what's up? Are you okay." I asked really concerned.

"Umm, no. Not really." She said and sounded like she was cry.

Oh my fucking god. What it's happening?

"Hey. What's wrong? Talk to me." I said in a comforting voice trying to calm her down a little.

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have called. It's stupid." She said and sounded like she was gonna hang up on me.

"No, no. It's not stupid. Anything that makes you upset is definitely not stupid. Now talk to me." I said quickly hoping she would tell me.

"Remember..." She started to say sounding upset, "remember at the hospital when you made that joke about me being jealous over all your past girlfriend and I denied it?" She said and I nodded.

"Yes."

"I lied." She said with her voice cracking a little. I frowned my eyebrows confused not knowing where this was gonna go.

"I do get jealous when I see you with all those girls who follow you around and talk to you and play with your hair. And I know it's not your fault and I can't blame you and I don't. I blame myself." She said making me squeeze my eyes shut.

I'm a fucking asshole. I clenched my jaw so much I thought my teeth might break.

"Ash... please say something. I'm sorry." She said.

"I'm a fucking idiot." I whispered.

"What?" She asked confused.

"I'm being a fucking dick to you and I didn't even realize it." I said pissed.

How could I have not know that she would be watching me and have feelings about the people I interact with.

"No your not." She said.

"Yes I am. You're crying over something I had the power to control. So it's my fault. I hurt you." I said and my eyes widened. "I hurt you." I whispered to myself.

I hung up and then ran my fingers through my hair. "Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no." I said pissed and slammed my fist on the lockers.

"What an inconsiderate little bitch!" I yelled and felt a tear rolling down my face.

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Hey I'm sorry to do this but I'm gonna take a little bit of a break from updating this book because I've go a lot of things on my mind and I hope you all understand.

And please don't be upset because it's not gonna be that long.

Love you all💜🦔🌻

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