Becoming Aredhel

Chapter Two- An Unexpected Gift

Elladan's POV

"Faster, Onas."

The raven-colored stallion beneath me reacts instantly to my command. I can feel his raw strength and his happiness to be free through the way he moves. He is just as relieved as I am to have left the confines of our home.

Imladris is the most beautiful valley in all of Middle Earth- it is my home- but it can be quite suffocating at times. As the eldest between my twin and I, I am the one who will one day inherit the house of my father, and with it, his responsibilities. I have known this from a very young age, yet I find myself unable to hide from my own feelings and emotions. I value solitude at times. I value peace and freedom. I crave it in the very depths of my soul.

Oh, to be free and unburdened like the creature beneath me. Onas merely sleeps, eats, and frolics about like an elfling. He is a spoiled creature.

Elrohir appears beside me astride his own horse with his usual smirk on his lips. "So, I take it the meeting did not go well?" he calls over to me as I slow Onas.

I take in the sight of the thick tree trunks around us as we weave between them, having memorized the trails of this forest back when we were both mischievous elflings looking for adventure.

"It did not go badly," I reply after a moment, gazing at my brother's grey eyes that are identical to my own. "I am just tired."

"Tired? Maybe you should try sleeping sometime," he jests lightly. "You work too hard. I know you are passionate about Healing, but you must rest."

"You know perfectly well what I mean, 'Ro," I sigh. "I am worn out from all of these meetings and feasts and balls. How do you stay so merry- so positive? Are you not tired of it all?"

He shakes his head, suddenly serious. "You are the eldest. 'Tis only natural that Ada is harder on you. He wishes only the best for you. He wants you to find your mate. We all know you are lonely," he says softly, looking away from me for a moment.

His expression is one of poorly concealed pity. He has seen my dreams, heard my thoughts, through the soul bond we share as twins. He knows my heart better than anyone else, maybe even better than myself. He has felt the cold fingers of depression and loneliness that grasp onto me when I least expect it. He knows how desperately I long for her, for the elleth that was created for only me to love for all of eternity.

"Yes, but these feasts he has been organizing... it is not the way to go about it. You know how some of the ellith can be," I say lowly, tilting my head slightly.

Elrohir laughs gaily. "Any elleth in Middle Earth would tear the eyes out of anyone who stands in the way of marrying you, 'Dan. Are you not used to that notion by now?"

"I despise such an attitude in a female, or in anyone. Hatred, jealousy, greed- what does one gain with these feelings? Nothing. I want an equal. Someone who sees themselves as being no better than anyone else in this world. I want someone who will love me for me, not for a title or riches. We may not be princes, but as lords of the House of Elrond, we are treated as such, you and I," I murmur, brushing my fingers through Onas's mane absentmindedly. "Is it too much to want a wife who will enjoy spending time with me, doing nothing of importance but having fun, nonetheless? I imagine her as someone who would fancy such things- my soulmate, I mean. I would like to ride horses, just as you and I are doing now, or go swimming by the waterfalls. I would love for us to walk barefoot through the forest and over grassy plains, just talking and enjoying the company of one another."

Elrohir laughs loudly and embarrassment creeps up my cheeks in the form of a faint blush. "No elleth in Imladris would dare dream of such things, Elladan. They wear their finest dresses everyday in hopes of stumbling across you and ensnaring you with their seductive ways. Walking barefoot through the grass? Not likely at all. Though they may go swimming with you, brother, but not for innocent pleasure."