Abusive Husband- P. Jimin (ON GOING)

34- Everything

-August 13 2019 Monday, 14:22pm at Saerin's-

Saerin has grown used to Jimin not being around anymore and completely forgetting that he exists in this world. she's been living at peace with Taeyun while Kaho supporting them.

the woman is now on the couch peacefully watching the television while holding the remote control, she's been pressing the "next channel'' button for the past 10 minutes. since she's on her day-off she has nothing else to do but sit on her couch and she have already done cleaning the house and bringing her son back home from school.

suddenly she heard someone rang the doorbell.

speaking of the devil

she looked at the screen and saw a familliar black haired man standing 4 steps away from the camera. she opened the door just enough to see his face but kept the chain lock on.

"what d-do you want?" Saerin asked trying to be more assertive.

"can you just let me in first?" Jimin asked trying to be polite.

"I don't want you in here and you have no rights to set foot in my house floors, I just cleaned them up."

"don't you sass at me, slut" Jimin took a step forward but Saerin slammed the door shut and locked the doorknob.

'goodjob Jimin' Jimin thought.

she slided down the door burying her face in her hands since she felt like she was about to cry. just then she heard knocks.

"go away!" she shouted hoping Taeyun wouldn't hear her.

"I just wanted to talk, okay?!" Jimin shouted back.

she sighed and asked herself if it's really okay for him to go inside.
so she just thought that they could talk in the guestroom which has wide space enough for them to stand at opposite corners while talking.

"fine" she whispered to herself and finally opened the door and brought him to the guestroom.

"w-what did you want to talk about?" she asked not looking at him.

"I'm sorry"

there was only silence and she couldn't believe it. the Park Jimin apologizing, the man who made her heart skip a beat but also brought her pain and embarrassment, the man who she waited many years to change is right here infront of her saying he's "sorry".

but what she was concerned was not about why he'd suddenly show up apologizing. she wanted to ask what Jimin was sorry about. is it the fact that he gave her both head and heartache? or the fact that he threatened the shit out of her saying that he'd kill his son and his friend?

"about what?" she finally asked but her voice slightly shaking.

now it was Jimin's turn to be confused. isn't she going to say "I forgive you" or something like that? it's like Saerin have read his thoughts since she answered.

"no Jimin, It's not as easy as you think" her voice cracked at the last word. and for the first time, she didn't stutter.

Jimin was having mixed thoughts right now and his heart somehow ached.

-Flashback-

"I know this'll make you gag but, I want you to think about Saerin more often" Kaejun suggested before slamming the door. since he didn't want his brother to keep telling him funny names such as "idiot" or "dumbass bitch" anymore, he took the advice and did what he was told.

so the next day, he thought about her for more than an hour and he reminded himself about their school days. he thought about what he liked about her, how their relationship worked and the times when they talked about their future.

Jimin remembered it all. but what still confuses him was what does this all have to do with apologizing, and why do he need to remember all of this.

Until one specific day, he was watching this drama on his phone which was about highschool romance and Jimin watched how the guy named Yun apologized to the girl named Minha after he was caught cheating on her.
and surprisingly, she forgave him. this scene gave Jimin the motivation he wanted and needed.

Yun thought about Minha's favourite things and the things he does that used to make her smile, and he also thought about her worth and just like other cheesy typical stories, the guy regretted hurting the girl's feelings.

that's why Jimin decided to go to his ex-wife's house and apologize to her. he thought about everything that made Saerin happy. but he doesn't know that he was still missing something.

he forgot to think about her worth and the reason why she still stayed after making her live through pain

-End of flashback-

Saerin POV

"I came here telling that I'm sorry, aren't you happy I'm back?"

you don't fucking know

"Jimin after everything you put me through, you think I still want to forgive you?"

I don't care if I look helpless right now, I want to let him know everything.

"you put me through hell, you made me feel like I'm a worthless piece of mistake! YOU MADE ME FEEL LIKE I WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH TO EVEN EXIST!"

I screamed all the feelings and thoughts I kept inside. the pain, the agony, the despair, fucking everything. I don't fucking care if I'm crying infront of him, I don't care if Taeyun heard me.

I.Don't.Fucking.Care.Anymore.

what I only care about is to fucking let him know everything I felt and that a simple fucking sorry isn't fucking enough.

"it's only natural for husbands to discipline their wives!"

"discipline??" I scoffed.

"YOU FUCKING ABUSED ME, PUNCHING ME KICKING ME, SLAPPING ME. YOU PRACTICALLY HATED ME FOR BREATHING!"

I slided down the wall and allowed my tears to roll down my cheeks.

Jimin POV

"you're the one who once made me feel like I deserved the world, but then you made me feel like I don't deserve to breathe."

I don't know but why do I feel like crying when seeing her like this.

I feel like she doesn't deserve to be like like this.

"that day when you stabbed me, I felt happy for once because I finally get to die and be free from all the stress you put me through."

she looked at the ceiling with a bitter smile while letting her tears fall.

"I just wanted to die" she sobbed.

I feel like someone was squeezing my heart and I held my chest thinking that it would ease the pain.

"stop crying, please."