penny.

9; Comedian or stoner?

"Okay so, are we ranting, killing, or stuffing our faces?" She said as she led me upstairs. The inside of her house was homey, just like the one in Ridgecrest. We hadn't been friends or anything like that, but her brother threw some good parties before he moved into Northview so most of us had been there at one time or another.

"Well, I don't think I can go to jail again," I said sarcastically and winked at her when she turned to let me inside her room. Yellow paint covered the walls with white furniture accenting the large room. She led me to her queen sized bed and pulled out two small pints of ice cream from the mini fridge next to it, grabbing two spoons from the container on top. "You're prepared." I tease her and she pushed my shoulder gently.

"Spill."

So I did. Between spoonfuls of rocky road I told her what about my mom leaving and why it hurt so bad when I had to move away from everything when Papa died, only to witness my best friend getting it on with my boyfriend. I told her how now I'm so angry all the time and fighting in the ring is the one thing that makes me feel even remotely better. I told her about the boys and I lingered a little longer on my description of Eli before balling my eyes out at the admittance of everything. I knew things had to get worse before they got better but damn, this really sucked.

I knew I was angry, but the sadness was a different feeling. I hadn't properly mourned Papa, I knew that deep down. The summer had been full of me wallowing in Jay's room, smoking cigarettes on the porch with Luis and cleaning out any memory of Papa and shoving it in a storage unit. I hadn't gone there since the summer, it was hard enough to be at my house but seeing all of his things and knowing he's never coming back really fucking sucked.

If I told Papa about what Jay did to me he would have no mercy. Sure, he was like a son to him, but anyone who hurt me was automatically on his hate list. I'm not kidding, he kept a list of everyone who did him wrong. It was mostly full of Kings and other gang members that tried to hurt him but Mom's name was on there, in tiny handwriting in the corner of the page. But I was his princess, he looked at me like I was his entire world, but really he was mine. The only emotion I've been able to fully let back in has been anger, and people keep pissing me off.

Ruby didn't look at me with pity or tell me it was going to be okay or any of that bullshit I was expecting. Instead she moved closer and put her arm around my shoulder and said, "Jay never deserved you and neither did Marisol, but you know what? I'm here now, and I'll be damned if I let anyone break your precious heart again. We're besties now, got it?"

I laughed at her response but I knew deep down she was right, about all of it, but mostly I knew that we were going to be very, very good friends.

"Thanks, Ruby, seriously." She had absolutely no reason to let me spill my guts out but she sat there and listened with no objections.

"What are besties for?" I threw my empty pint at her and we laughed on her bed. It felt like I was at Mari's house, gossiping about Jay and whatever boy had her interest at the time. But this wasn't Mari's, and I didn't feel sorry one bit.

Ruby skated back to the compound with me after I was finished ranting to grab the car for the weekend. We weaved through cars and empty parking lots with no care in the world, and honestly it was the best I've felt in forever. She made it seem so easy to forget about Jay and Papa and everything wrong in my life, it was refreshing to say the least.

When we got back to the compound I went straight to the garage to pick up the black BMW Kaydence was letting me borrow. I was expecting something a lot less flashy but I didn't mind the extravagance for a few nights.

"Damn, once I get more money I'm buying myself one of these," Ruby said as she ran her hand along the passenger side of the car.

"I like my board better," I chuckled at her and grabbed the keys from the hook they were hanging on. I usually only drove when we had drops and Jay wasn't my partner because apparently, he was always supposed to drive.