Emotions #2

7

Lyra

Laying in my bed, I smile to myself. Yesterday evening was the best time I've had in a while. I'd relive it over and over again if I could.

Aryse

Laying in bed, I stare up at the ceiling. I've written 5 letters for her. I don't think I'll ever be able to give them to her. I hear a knock at my door and I get up to open it, but before I get to the door Hayden walks in.
"Hey I got your text. Are you okay?" He walks over to me and embraces me in a hug. I hug him back tightly.
"I'm fine. I'm fine.."
"Aryse, what's wrong?"
I look up at him and rub his cheek with my thumb. "You won't leave me will you?" I feel a tear run down my cheek.
Hayden wipes it away with his thumb. "Hey..shh no crying. I'm not going anywhere." He kisses me lightly, and I pull him closer to me. He kisses me harder and pushes me to the bed.
  "No.. I can't." I push him off of me and stand up. He lays on the bed staring at me confused. "You- what did you do with Addison?.."
  "Aryse.. don't-"
  "I want to know what you two did." I turn away from him.
  "Aryse..that doesn't matter right now."
  "The hell it does! You fucked her, Hayden!" I feel the tears in my eyes. "You touched her..and then kept it from me while we did the same thing.. Why didn't you tell me?" I turn to look at him and tear falls down my cheek.
"You were too busy with Lyra to even care." He stands up and walks closer to me. "I did touch Addison. What more do you want?"
  I turn away unable to look at him. "Get out of my room."
  "Seriously, Aryse? You're just going to tell me to get out? Fine. Oh and just thought you'd know. Addison was amazing. She's so easy to please."
  "Get out!!" I yell more loudly than I intend to. "Get the fuck out of my house! I never want to see your face again." Tears streaming down my face, I run to the bathroom and throw up.
  How can he do something like that and be so proud of it? Who does that.. I can't.. I can't even think about that night when we.. I take a deep breath to calm myself. I wash my face and hands and walk to my desk.  I sit down and start writing.
  Lyra..
~~~
  I wake up and realise I'm still at my desk. I look at my phone to see the time. 2:47am. I sigh and stand up and walk to the bathroom. I can't help but think about her.
  I wonder what she's been doing lately. Is she struggling like I am, or she moving on and enjoying herself? Has she met someone new? Does she have new friends? Have I been replaced?..
  I get a drink of water and lay down on my bed. Laying there thinking of her, I fall asleep.
~~~
  I wake up and instantly wish that I didn't. I'm not in the mood to face the day. I have a photo shoot. With him..
  I get up and get dressed. I do my morning routine and head downstairs.
  "Hey. You alright? Hayden left last night and he seemed pissed." My dad is at the counter pouring himself a cup of coffee.
  "He fucked Addison." I walk over and pour a cup for myself.
  "Well damn. So are you two done?"
  "I guess so." I sigh and set down my cup. I feel myself start to tear up.
  "Hey. It's alright. Tough it out. At least for today, alright?" He puts his hand on my shoulder. "Just two hours is all I'm asking. Please don't let this ruin the photo shoot."
  "I don't want to do it. I can't.. I-" Tears fall down my cheek. "I can't stand to be around him.."
  "What about Sadie? Would you rather work with her today? It's last minute but I can work it out."
  "Please.."
  "Don't get yourself too worked up, you'll get sick." He pulls me into a hug.
  I lay my head on his shoulder. "Mum would know what to say..I miss her.."
  "I do too, son. I do too." He releases the hug. "Toughen up and let's go or we're going to be late." He grabs his car keys and I grab my backpack and we head out to the car.
  Once in the car, I turn on the radio.
"Could you find a way to let me down slowly? A little sympathy I hope you can show me."
  I sigh and turn it off. Fuck life.. My dad looks over at me and smiles. I smile back.
  We arrive at the studio and I get out slowly. "Don't worry I called Hayden off. He's not going to be here." I smile to myself and walk inside.
  "Air!" Sadie embraces me in a tight hug. I smile and hug her back.
  "Hey." 
  "I'm happy to be working with you again. It's been so long." She smiles at me.
  "Me too." I agree. I'm just happy I don't have to do it with Hayden.
  "I'm sorry about you and Hayden. I-"
  "Please don't. I don't want to talk about it." I smile and grab her hand. "Come on. We have a photo shoot to do."
~~~
  "I missed that so much." Sadie and I are sitting at a table in the studio.
  "Me too."
  "Are you okay?"
  "Yeah."
  "For real, Aryse. Since Lyra left you haven't been yourself." She puts her hand on mine. "I'm here as your friend. You can tell me."
  "I think about her more than I should. I miss her so much. She's probably moved on.." I take a deep breath to keep myself from crying.
  "I can help you with that." She smiles at me.
  "How?"
  "My big brother. Lyra is going to the same school as he is."
  "Really?"
  "Yes. Sage Kanter my asshole of a brother. He's a year above us. I'm sure he'd help. I can text him later and ask him."
"Oh, Sadie. You're the best." I smile at her and stand up. "I have to go. Text me when you find something out."
Outside in my car, I sigh. I might get to see her.. I smile to myself and head home.

The song mentioned above; Let me down slowly - Alec Benjamin