Niall Horan Imagines

You break out of your shell

Niall Horan imagines:

~Depression~

Your pov-

Like every other day that goes on, I find myself staring out my window for the longest time. My eyes look straight at the house across from mine as the neighbors have their constant family gatherings.

Their silhouettes show how their all full of laughter. Smiling. Having fun. And then there's me. Watching from a distance.

Recently I had been diagnosed with bipolar depression. I've been taking the meds and all but they don't seem to work on me.

I've always been known to be bipolar but my depression progressed since the passing of my mother a few months ago. She was my best friend and ever since she died of cancer I have found myself sinking into a deeper and deeper hole of loneliness.

I haven't stepped out of my house since the funeral. My roommate and best friend has been taking care of me. She doesn't mind it I guess. She understands since she went through the same thing.

She keeps telling me to get out there and meet somebody. Be happy again.

I just don't see myself doing that. I see myself laying in my bed watching Netflix and staring out my window.

My window is now my go - to place to be. I've probably been sitting here for hours. Hand under my chin as my elbow rests against the cold wooden ledge.

I've always dreamed of getting out into the world. But my depression has kept me locked into this world of darkness.

The only thing that's good is the fact I'm not suicidal. I used to even be in a S.A.D.D club (students against destructive decisions.) But that was a while ago.

I hardly notice the rain pouring down from the sky. I'm so focused on my thoughts and staring out at the house across the street. I'm guessing it's someone's birthday due to the fact there is balloons taped to the mailbox, but are being torn at by the wind.

All the people in the house across the street are having a blast. Must be nice. I finally decide to close my window and not be too creepy. I get up groggily and close the curtains.

"Wow you got up." I hear my best friend Mikayla say. I turn to her and fake a smile. She folds her arms and eyes the door. I shake my head and flop on my bed.

"You can't just waste your life away Y/N. Come on let's go out tonight. It's Friday and you haven't seen an ounce if civilization in months."

I look up from my soft pillow and groan. She sighs and sits on the edge of the bed. "Come on let's just go to the bar or something."

"I don't drink." I remind her. She groans and runs a hand through her long hair.

"Then let's go to the arcade." She suggests. I look at her and raise an eyebrow. Is she serious??

She looks at me with begging eyes. I sigh and give in. "Fine. Just an hour if even. I will not socialize with ANYONE got that?" I say pointing a finger at her. She grins big and takes my hand pulling me off my bed.

"Let's look hot!" She takes me to my giant walk in closet. She flicks on the light and looks around at all my clothes. "How about a little black dress?" She says taking down a black dress I had.

"It's the arcade. I'm just gonna wear some jeans and a tee." I shrug and walk out of the closet. I hear her groan. "Well can I wear it?" She calls.

"Whatever." I sigh and head to my dresser. I take out a pair of dark denim blue skinny jeans and a white basic tank. I throw it on then toss my hair in a high pony.