It's been four days and life has been so odd. I've never experienced a death that was so close to me. A day after Donny died, we found out that he was down in Compton when he was shot in a drive by. Mya couldn't help but be suspicious about why her brother was down there. Today is the funeral, and I'd be lying if I said I was ready. No one knows about Donny and I and I really don't want anyone to get suspicious. Just my dad and I are going to the funeral because Gigi is visiting Dre in Flint. I listened to my music while I got ready. For some reason, every song reminded me of Donny. Everything has been reminding me of Donny. Damn, is this how my dad felt when mom died? I sighed as I did some light makeup. I went with light makeup because I'll probably cry by the end of the day. I finally finished getting ready and I walked into my room to get dressed. I sighed as I looked over my final outfit.
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I'd usually send Donny a picture of my outfit and he'd send something cute back telling me how beautiful I am or how good I look. I guess I can't do that anymore. I fluffed my curly hair one last time before I grabbed my phone, purse, and sunglasses. I sighed as I walked downstairs.
"Hey, buddy." I smiled as Flint trotted up to me.
I played with Flint and took him outside to use the bathroom while I waited for my dad to get ready. I was sitting on the couch petting Flint when I heard my dad walking down the stairs. Flint and I got up off of the couch.
"You look nice," I told my dad as he fixed his Gucci belt.
"Thanks, you look beautiful." My dad said as he grabbed the keys to his Bently.
"Thanks." I smiled shyly.
"I'm sorry you have to deal with this, kid." He said as he pulled me in for a hug.
"Thanks, dad. I don't know life just feels different now that he's gone." I sighed as we hugged.
"It always does. No matter how much you try to hide it, your brain always finds a way to bring your emotions to the surface." My dad sighed as he spoke.
"Is that how you felt when you lost mom?" I asked as I looked up at his tall figure.
"Let's not talk about your mother right now. You're already going through a lot. You ready to go?" He asked as he shoved his phone in his pocket.
"Yeah," I spoke quietly.
We walked out in silence. We walked to the Bently and we got in. I sat in deep thought as my dad drove to the funeral home. He hasn't dealt with death well since mom died. I don't know, I guess he's just never dealt with a death as hard as my mom's. I can tell he's getting more stressed. We're coming up on 10 years since mom died and I can tell my dad doesn't want to acknowledge it. He obviously still loves her. I guess he just doesn't want to relive the pain he went through 10 years ago. I was broke out of my thoughts when my dad stopped at the funeral home. I sighed as we got out of the car. As I got out, I saw Jayden jogging up to me.
"Hey, Mya really needs you right now," I said as we did our handshake.
"Ok," I replied and turned to my dad. "I'll be right back."
I followed Jayden through the funeral home. I followed as he pulled me to a room in the back. He opened the door to reveal Mya crying.
"My," I said getting her attention. "What's wrong?"
"It's all my fault Len," She said as she ran up to me and hugged me. "I could've saved him."
"It's not your fault, My. It was his time." I tried to calm her as she cried.
"I could've confronted him about being in Compton. I could've stopped him." She cried as I held her.
"My, it was his time and when God wants his children back, he gets them back. Donny is in a much better place now." I told her as I felt her nod.
"Thanks, Len." She said as we pulled away.
"Ok, now let's get you cleaned up," I said making her smile.
After getting Mya cleaned up, we walked out into the main room. Mya went and stood by the casket with her family. I quickly hugged the West family before I sat down. I went and sat by my dad.
"He looks great." My dad spoke about Donny as I sat and looked up at the casket.
"I'll go see him after the service," I told him as I played with my nails.
I sighed as I watched people walk up to the West family and hug them. Occasionally, Mya and Jayden would look at me for comfort. I would give them a light nod. I sighed as I watched the service start.
***
The service was absolutely beautiful. Multiple people that were closest to Donny spoke. Mya and Jayden gave a speech together. Mr and Mrs.West gave a speech. The service recapped Donny's short, but wonderful life. I sighed as my dad and I stood up to bid our final goodbyes. My dad and I are leaving after this because the gravesite service is just for family. My dad and I stood in line. I watched as women cried and their husbands hugged them. I sighed as I walked up to the casket. It hit me all at once. He was really gone. I wasn't going to be able to hug him again. Kiss him again. Watch him play basketball again. Go on crazy car rides again. Tears fell as I looked at his peaceful state. His eyes were closed, forever hiding the beauty in his bright emerald eyes. My hand shook as I laid it on his arm.
"I love you," I told him before I broke down.
I sobbed as I felt a set of arms pull me into them. I cried as I held onto my dad's suit jacket.
"He's gone." I choked out as I cried.
"I know baby." My dad said as he held me. "He's in a better place."
I continued to cry as my dad held me.
"Let's get you home, kid." My dad said as he dried my tears.
I nodded as my dad walked me out to our car. He helped me get in before she started to car. He walked back in to tell the Wests thank you. My breath caught in my throat as I tried to calm myself down. I sighed as I wiped away my tears. I had just steadied my breathing when my dad got in the car. We were silent as we left the funeral home.
"You ok, babe?" My dad asked as he held my hand.
I took a deep breath and nodded.
"It seemed like he meant a lot to you." My dad said making my heart hurt.
"I grew up with him," I said as I played with my hair.
"He wasn't more than just your best friend's brother was he?" My dad asked making my heart drop.
I took a deep breath before I spoke, "He was more than Mya's brother."
"Were you two like a couple? Is that why he asked you to wifo?" My dad asked as he kept his eyes on the road.
"Not offically. We kinda just started talking one day. We decided to keep it a secret from everyone because we thought all hell would break loose if we told anyone. Not even Mya knows." I spoke as more tears fell.
"Did you think I'd be mad or something?" My dad asked still kinda in shock.
"No, we just weren't ready to tell anyone. We planned on making it offical wifo night, but I guess that's not gonna happen." I said as I choked up.
"I'm sorry babe. I want you to know that you never have to hide anything from me." My dad said as he held my hand.
"I know. Thank you, dad," I said as I leaned my head on his arm.
"If I'm being totally honest, I always saw you and one of the West boys ending up together. You and Mya want to be sisters that bad."
