alive | ethma

10.

ethan dolan

It was absolutely pouring outside.

The first week of classes was over, and it was Friday afternoon now. The whole week was uneventful really, the only highlight being my water balloon fight with Emma.

Which is why I made it a point to see her again today.

I knocked on her apartment door, shifting my feet awkwardly while I wait for her to open it.

Fuck, why am I doing this? She's probably busy, right?

I turn my body around to leave and only make it one step before I hear the door creak open.

"Hey," I could practically hear her sweet smile. That voice practically yanked my body to turn around and face the door entrance again.

Her voice always drew me in, just like a sailor being drawn to the voice of a siren. Only, I hoped the difference was that she wasn't luring me to my death.

"What are you doing here?" Emma innocently questioned me. I almost gasped at the sight. Her long brown hair flowing down her shoulders, her patterned pajama shorts hugging her legs, and her cute little glasses sitting on top of the bridge of her freckled nose.

"Um, it's pouring outside, I don't know if you noticed," I stuttered out. God fucking dammit. You would think I've known her long enough now to not stutter my words.

But, no matter how much time I spend with her, the effect she had on me never seemed to lessen.

Suddenly a huge clap of thunder rang through the apartment building, bringing me back to reality.

She giggled, "yeah I did know it was raining."

"Right," I cleared my throat, "so I was thinking we could watch some more movies, what do you say?"

"Fuck yes!" Emma clapped her hands together and ran back inside with me following at her footsteps.

And then I realized something I've known for a while now.

She was unlike anyone I've ever known.

Emma didn't have to belong. In fact, she didn't want to belong. She belonged to herself and herself only; no validation necessary.

This girl managed to bring light to my own reality. She didn't make me want to find a way to escape it.

She glides through life like it's a video game that she'll always win.

I want to be a part of that life. Always.

"I don't have time to make us a fort so we have to just settle for my plain bed," she said so casually, like the idea of me laying in her bed didn't give me goosebumps.

"I'll get the popcorn, where is it?" I needed time to compose myself.

"In the pantry on the left," she yelled back at me, already halfway into her bedroom.

I took a deep breath and threw the popcorn in the microwave.

The next minute while the popcorn was cooking, my thoughts were consumed with flashbacks of the past two weeks.

Her smiling. Her laughing. Me smiling. Me laughing.

I forcefully shook my head, trying to shake the memories out.

I wasn't used to feeling all these emotions, it was almost scary.

I shoved those thoughts aside and snuck into Emma's bedroom where she had already set up a movie.

She looked up at me and patted the spot next to her.

I turned off the light and set the popcorn down on the table near the door. My body sprinted at her and flopped onto the bed.

"You're gonna break my fucking bed," Emma attempted to stay serious, but a smile broke out on her face.

After a couple minutes, we were both silent and engrossed in the movie. Well, I wasn't.

And it turns out she wasn't either.

"Ethan," she gently whispered halfway through the movie.

"Hm?" I turned my head towards her slowly.

I couldn't decipher the look in her eyes.

"Can you go get the popcorn you left on the table?"

"Oh, sure," I started to lift myself out of the bed, the bed frame squeaking.

Her hand stopped me. She pushed my shoulder back down, and let her hand linger there.

"Emma?"

"I wanna, uh, I wanna try something," she stated, rather unsurely, while her fingers inched towards my face.

She could probably hear my heart beating a million miles an hour and my stomach turning inside out.

Her whole body was moving painfully slow. Her eyes trained on my eyes, waiting for my reaction.

Emma's gaze gave me a sudden burst of confidence.

"What do you want to try?" I whispered softly.

"Another adventure," she stated breathlessly. Her eyes glowing from the screen light of the movie, she was beautiful.

I didn't let myself think twice before I crashed my lips onto hers.

[sappy as fuck]