You all give me chest pains, we are at 700 reads, I am not okay.
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September 16th
Michael,
God how could you do that? Write me after all this fucking time?
I don't know what anything you said meant. Do you love me? What are we?
I had my session with Becca moments ago. I'm outside, sitting on a cold bench with your cream sweater keeping me warm. I sound pathetic but by now I don't think I have anything to lose.
She knew I was different, happier. Am I happy? No...just happier.
However, she asked me a strange question.
"Where are your bracelets?"
Now I didn't understand what she meant until I looked at my wrists, seeing some of my scars showing.
She looked me in the eyes and said, "I know what you are doing Andrea."
Now at first I thought she meant when I etched your name into my skin, but I then realized I hadn't taken off my bracelets.
They had fallen off. I had lost so much weight from lack of eating, that my wrists grew smaller and they slipped off in my sleep. Rebecca, seeing my scars, knew I wouldn't risk them being seen and so discovered what I was doing to myself.
I promised that I was getting better, to give me one more chance. She agreed, after my pleading, but now I have to give her updates everyday and I cannot keep anything from her.
I ate a muffin today, I hope you are proud of me.
-Andy
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~loser Sam that loves you all v v much
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