Hearts & Minds | WATTY Winner

Chapter 6 | The Canyon

      Margaret Ko sat on the floor of her living room next to a half-packed cardboard box she had already labeled PHOTOS with a Sharpie. An album lay open in her lap, but she wasn't looking at it. She was simply staring into space. The snapshots in the book were of Peter and their girls, taken on a family vacation to the Grand Canyon. Peter had loved road trips, probably because they saved money on plane tickets, but he also claimed they were the best way to see the sights whatever those might be. He was a fan of film history, and tried to hit obscure places not too far off the beaten path such as motels where Clark Gable was purported to have slept. He preferred doing the driving, and Margaret only had to get behind the steering wheel for about a fourth of the time they were on the freeway, highway, or country road of Peter's choosing. Otherwise, she and the girls read books, played Punch Buggy, sang songs with the local radio stations if there were any, argued (she mostly mediated, but more often than not, the girls sucked her into their fracas), and took naps.

Margaret wished she had appreciated these trips more at the time. She told him that she did, her dearly departed husband, whispering to him every night right before falling asleep. "I loved our family vacations. You being around to fix the oven was something I always took for granted. The girls have your smile, and I'm so happy I get to see them in you."

The photograph that had sent her down memory lane was one Rainey had taken of Nora and Peter. He was pretending to pull her over the edge of the canyon at one of the visitor viewing sites. She was screaming and laughing in a way Margaret hadn't seen her do in years. And yet there was something in her face in this photo, something that Margaret had started to recognize again. It was a gleam in her eye and a barely noticeable curve at the corner of her daughter's mouth that surfaced when she was around Theo Furlan. It was a radiance that lit up her whole being anytime someone mentioned his name.

Margaret loved that her eldest daughter was that happy again. Nora was good at getting along, at taking care of others, and even adequate at taking care of herself. She did not complain (except now and then about poor Rainey, which even Margaret—her youngest child's greatest defender—had to admit was sometimes warranted). She seemed perfectly content. Yet, Margaret was sure Nora was just...existing. She had not actually been living, not for a while at any rate. Margaret had been through such a phase herself more than once, most notably right before she met Peter and again after he died. Mainly, Nora and Cole had pulled her out of it, and Margaret had found a renewed sense of purpose in seeing to the raising of her daughters and in making The Cottage—Peter's dream— a success. Before Cole's death, the tearoom was in a good way, and the girls were all right, but there was still so much to accomplish. To be sure, her daughters were still just young women, but time was marching on. As a mother, she needed to get cracking. One step at a time, of course. For Rainey, that meant getting focused on her fashion design career. For Nora—Margaret wasn't sure what it meant. Nora rarely dated and had few friends, so Margaret could only speculate as mothers do: Was Nora gay? Asexual? Was she emotionally stunted? Was she not trying hard enough to meet the right person? Trying too hard? With the arrival of Theo Furlan, Margaret was sure the answer had been found.

And then, she'd had a conversation with that god-awful Bunny Furlan, the morning they left for Napa.

Nora, Theo, and Rainey had been saying their goodbyes to each other outside the Cottage, and Bunny had been nattering on about getting her stupid wine bar off the ground, completely oblivious to the fact that it was killing Margaret to have to hear about the "top to bottom ren-oh"—or maybe not that oblivious at all—when the sneaky minx had abruptly changed the subject.

"Well, the children certainly seem to be getting along. I'm just so delighted about it."

Margaret took a beat to grind through the emotional gears—misery to delight. She turned to look out the window with a happy sigh. Nora was doing that radiating thing, gazing at Theo as he spoke. He had taken off his sunglasses and was looking at her so intently, his head bent so their faces were close.