What the Heart Needs - JiKook

Chapter 6 - Why Didn't You Listen?

Jimin had scared the hell out of me the other night in the gym. He had barely touched on the idea of our relationship being over and it sent me into a panicked spiral. I couldn't let that happen. He was right... I needed to get my jealousy under control. And as much as I hated to admit it, I was weak. Much like Jimin, my emotions got the best of me. Unfortunately, the strongest emotion I had when it came to Jimin, was fear. Sometimes it overruled my love for him, along with my logic.

It wasn't only the threat of losing him that scared me though. When Jimin gets really angry, he scares the hell out of me. His normally soft and sweet voice will turn gruff, harsh and carries such an intimidating husky quality to it. I never thought I could be scared of my squishy lover, but 'Dark Jimin' was a force, and I dared not go against him. None of us did. He wasn't violent, but when the switched flipped, he went from tiny, delicate and graceful to six foot tall and capable of anything. I knew he meant what he said; the good parts and the bad. I was in dangerous territory now; one more really big slip up and he might actually leave me. What would I do without him? He had become my reason for everything. I sang because of his support. I was able to fight through the pain endless performances put on me because he was by my side... I'm here now because he believed in me. From the day I met him as a trainee, I was fated to be with him. I was so young; just a kid, but even then, I knew Jimin would be special to me. If only I had known just how special... I would have accepted him sooner. I have to work hard to improve myself, I can't lose him. He's the kindest, most caring person I know.

The days ticked by, and while Jimin was quiet around me, he wasn't avoiding me. I knew what this was, he was showing me a small taste of what my world could be like if I didn't shape up and get my habits under control. I didn't like this at all, and I don't know if I would survive if the gap ever truly formed. I saw him with that water girl... no, Miran, her name is Miran... I saw Jimin with Miran several times. He would talk to her during practice breaks and they were always laughing and having a good time. I still hated it, but he said nothing was going on. I trusted him, I would never doubt his word, but it still ate at me... that fear in the back of my mind. I wanted to hate her, but she really wasn't so bad. A few times, I forced myself to join their conversations and try to get to know her better. I was hoping that if I could get comfortable with her, the fears would subside.

My plan was actually working. The more time I spent with them, the less she felt like a threat. I could see that Jimin was just enjoying his time with her, no flirting was going on and his tone of voice was always so casual and relaxed. I can do this, I can accept her and put the fears to rest. Heaving a sigh, I decided it was okay to let this go, I would be okay, WE would be okay. It felt so good to feel the jealousy dissipating.

"No kidding!?", Jimin said, and I turned to look in his direction. He was with Miran again.

"I know! Can you believe it!?", she responded. Both of them had the biggest smiles on their faces. It looked like they were sharing in some kind of joke or celebration.

"...date fast approaching... ...can't wait to be there... ...You'll be beautiful...", their voices were quieter now, but I distinctly heard those words come from Jimin's mouth.

"...so lucky to have you..." Who is lucky to have her?? Not Jimin, right?? He said they were just friends... but the words I'm hearing are making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up!

What the hell!? Now he's holding her hands! "I'll meet you in the west hall after practice, can't wait!" Okay, that whole statement I heard. There was no mistaking it. I could feel my anger bubbling to the surface. Anger and... hurt. How could he do this to me? Why!? The west hall... that place wasn't used for anything anymore, other than storage. What could he possibly be wanting to do with her in that abandoned... no. No! That can't be it!