alusion (because the world needed it)

teach me to love

holy SHIT i actually worked on/continued a draft???   && finished it?????????!!!!  o   m   f   g.   tysfm magic chapter for inspiration to write im screami n g
category: oneshot
word count: 1409

What's the point of it all?

Dragging through existence.

Training.

Killing demons.

It was all on repeat. Again. And again. And again.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thankyou, thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou-

It all blurred together.

Perhaps that's why they called him cold.

So many tried to break through his barriers--Miya, Zilong, Ruby, the list went on. He never let them in. And, at first, it wasn't like he didn't try--he did! He tried to fucking hard to feel something, feel that spark, feel some motivation. Nothing. It was always fucking nothing. It would've hurt if he could felt it because, really, it was all numb.

Wake up.

Hunt.

Sleep.

Repeat.

Hunting was the only way he felt something, anything. The revenge, avenging his parents. Wait, no--there were other things he felt, too. The disgust when he saw Tigreal. The hate. The pain. It was his fault, his fault, his fucking fault. And yet the general still had the audacity to try and fucking recruit him. If murder wasn't a crime, thr bastard would already be dead.

So, perhaps it was a combination of all of that that'd dragged him out this night, dragged him out onto the secluded pond, one he hadn't ever told anyone about. It was his area--his.

And it was peaceful.

Surrounded by forest, the mellow pond being fed by a small waterfall, the ever-present sound of water trickling as it moved. But, tonight, something was off. Something was different.

Another man was sitting in his area, back turned to Alucard.

If he killed him, would anyone even have a clue?

"Excuse you." The thought was brushed off as he broke the tranquility, leaning om his sword as he looked down at the brunet.

The stranger obviously jumped, startled as he whipped around to face Alucard, eyes wide. "What're you-"

"How'd you find this place?"

The stranger stood up, crossing his arms. "I was taking a run through the forest. What's it to you?"

"What's it to me? This is the only damned place where I can find peace, that's what!" Perhaps it was anger that'd taken over him, perhaps the utter fucking exhaustion, but his façade was down, there was nothing held back. Emotion. Drainage. Emptiness.

A frown slipped onto the stranger's face, and before the stranger could speak, Alucard cut him off.

"Pity me. Please. I'll take pity over the same shit I hear every day, the same shit I have to say. Anything but this.. this mindless hell of fucking repetition!" The words were raw, and Alucard could hear a rasp in them. When was the last time he'd talked so much? It was always silence he answered with, and if he had to, he spoke as little as needed. Numbing, numbing, everything was just so numbing-

"Hey. Hey. Look up at me." Alucard hasn't notice the stranger coming up closer, hadn't noticed the hands placed on his shoulder. He didn't know why he complied with the brunet's orders. "Are you okay?"