alusion (because the world needed it)

*nightmares

**OLD FIC**
this was made before Alucard's backstory was reworked, and, honestly, i like how i wrote this too much to change it but im also lazy
category: drabble
word count: 569

Nightmares.

Darkness seeping into one's head and latching on to painful memories, yanking them to mind while one is at their most vulnerable--during one's sleep.  The worse the memory, the worse the nightmare.

Of course, nightmares do fade as time runs by, their occurrence becoming less and less until they trick one into thinking they're gone.

Such is the current case.

He fell asleep peacefully, his lover, Gusion, basically curled up into his side, head tucked into the crook of Alucard's neck while Alucard had an arm wrapped around Gusion's back.  At first it was just darkness, the usual color that accompanied him in his slumber.

And then came the heat.

The painful warmth of the flames around him, the demons around him.

Panic encased his mind as he was forced to remember, unable to move, unable to alter what had happened.

How his mother screamed on pain as she died.

The cry of agony as his father saw his wife die.

The sob that came from him as his mother's dead body was burned to ash, his father charging at the demons, only to die himself.

And, in the end, it was only him alive, the only remainder of what was left. 

The demons took him with them.
The following months were blurred, the only constant variable being the pain.  The torture.  It never stopped.  It was always there, the pain that racked throughout his young body for several months he was damned to a literal hell and there was no one, he was alone, there was only pain--

"Alucard!"

The blonde's eyes snapped open, panic and adrenaline filling him as he realized he was trapped, pinned down, and he began to thrash, gaze flickering all over the place, but at the same time not fully there, just trying to figure out how to break free--

"Alucard!"

Alucard's mind finally recognized where he was, snapping into its rightfully place, away from the memories.

"G-Gus--"  His voice slightly broke, a burning sensation in his throat as tears appeared in eyes, blurring his vision.  Gusion's grip loosened on him, knowing Alucard wouldn't be thrashing around anymore.

"Hey--hey, take your time, it's alright."  Gusion whispered softly, unjudging.

A sob came from Alucard, and he reached up, wrapping his arms around Gusion and clutching the back of his shirt, a bit of desperation laced into his action.

"It's okay.  It's okay."  Gusion murmured, slowly helping Alucard rise to a sitting position.  Seeing Alucard like this, so vulnerable, so fragile--it was unusual for Gusion, and, gods, Gusion just wanted him to be okay.  Alucard easily moved with him, burying his head into Gusion's shoulder as silent sobs racked through him.  As Alucard continued to cry into his shoulder, Gusion rubbed circles on hid back, slowly rocking back and forth.  The brunette didn't pry, didn't ask anything.  He only murmured soft promises and love.

Every being had their weakness, their fears, their haunting pasts.  It could drive one mad, and it was always good to have someone there to calm them and bring them back, someone who wouldn't judge them or think lowly of them for it.  Alucard was grateful he had such a person, grateful for Gusion and, god, he loved the other more than anything.  The thought of losing him as well was unbearable and he was sure the thought would soon haunt him in nightmares to come.