heavenly | p.hockstetter

nine

🔪 CW: animal mutilation🔪

finally, the weekend rolled around. on the friday evening, evangeline retired to her house, excited to fill in more pages of her secret diary behind her locked bedroom door. she greeted her mother quickly and ran up the stairs, shouting something about homework and the door was slammed before sonia could draw breath. evangeline immediately threw the locked book on her bed, locking her bedroom door and racing back towards the diary as quickly as possible. as she opened it, she pressed the semi-blunt tip of her ballpoint pen into her palm hard enough for feel a pop, followed by blood dripping onto the page. she stuck her tongue on the dripping wound, enjoying the warm and metallic sensation on her tongue. she then swished it around with some saliva from her mouth as she wrote something in the centre of the book. she stuck 2 fingers down her throat, enough to gag, as she felt new saliva form in her mouth. she then spat her creation on top of her writing, the bloody saliva mixture smudging the black ink. barely legible, the page read:

i am goddess

she continued writing, covering page after page with the same phrase, saliva, tears and blood. time felt frozen and infinite during her ritual, unaware of time itself until her mother interrupted her scribbling with a screeching speech about dinner. evangeline froze for a moment, rolling her eyes violently as soon as she processed her interruption. she packed up her work, locking it up inside it's case once more, washed her hands and face from the blood, sweat and tears, and placed a pink fabric bandaid over the wound on her palm which had grown significantly since she commenced her writing session. she skipped down the stairs in a silky pink nightgown, matching brunch-coat and fluffy white socks.
"it's just you and me tonight jellybear, eddie's at the denbrough's tonight." sonia explained, putting her cigarette out in the kitchen ashtray.
"alright mommy. thank you for dinner" evangeline chirped back, grabbing a pitcher of juice and two plastic cups for her and her mother. dinner was quiet, filled with small talk and the clink of cutlery.

after dinner, sonia painted her nails and watched television whilst evangeline washed up. she didn't mind though, she enjoyed the sting of the antibacterial soap and dirty dishwater against her palm wounds and being able to prick her fingertips on the knives as she washed them. after finishing the dishes, evangeline waltzed into the lounge room and kissed her mother on the temple from behind.
"goodnight mommy. i love you" she whispered sweetly, making sure to pull at her mother's heartstrings at every chance she got.
"sweet dreams jellybear" her mom called back, excited to get back to her soap opera.

jelly entered her room and closed the door behind her once more. not bothering to turn the light on, she flopped onto her bed. she slid one hand up her linen sheets and under her pillow. her hand met with her favourite switchblade, stroking it's polished hilt. for the last time that night, she sliced a small slit in the middle of her thumb, placing it immediately into her mouth to savour the metallic liquid as she drifted into another nightmare infested sleep.

darkness.
shallow breath.
barefoot.
the crunching of leaves.
bones.
a crack of light.
the shadow of a large gravestone.
a cross.
look down.
naked.
soaked in blood.
knife in hand.
screaming.
turn around.
it's a girl.
get closer.
it's not a girl.
it's patrick.
hes screaming.
get closer.
kneel down.
"patrick... i-"
"thank you goddess"
look down.
the knife is in his chest.
in.
and out.
in.
and out.
deeper.
and ou-
"EVANGELINE!"

she sat upright in bed, beyond pissed at the interruption. she turned to the clock. 6:45am.
"YES MOMMY?" she called back. she heard her mother run up the stairs.
"eddie's had an allergic reaction to something overnight, i've gotta take him to the hospital. will you be alright here? i've got a delivery coming at eight i need you to be around for."
"sure thing mommy" evangeline smiled, her blood boiling inside.
"i'll be back soon" sonia blew evangeline a kiss and then set off to collect her son, forgetting to close evangeline's bedroom door. as soon as she heard the front door slam shut, evangeline groaned and rolled out of bed, slipping her socks and brunch coat back on. she grabbed her knife, the packet of cigarettes and the lighter hidden in her bag and silently ran out her back door, keeping it unlocked for her return. she walked up to a small hole in the corner of her fence, hidden by a large shrub that hadn't been tended to for years and crawled through, emerging on the other side - a patch of derry forest. she slipped through the trees, finally arriving at a pile of heavy rocks. evangeline picked several of them up and lit herself a cigarette. she stood in silence, eyes closed, listening for the sounds of life around her. she heard a crunch, and another crunch, her eyes flew open as she pelted a large rock in the crunch's direction.

a small hare lay flat on it's back, it's back legs twitching. evangeline smiled and waltzed over to it - picking it up by a hind leg and slitting it's throat, cackling at the screeches and the sound of gushing blood.
"lets go home" she giggled to herself, slinging the creature over her shoulder and covering the back in blood. evangeline didn't care, she knew that it would take little more than a clean room and a small pout to get her mother to purchase her a new one.

without a care, evangeline slipped her shoes off as she entered the back door, slamming it shut behind her. she sauntered into the kitchen, cigarette still between her lips, and grabbed a roll of cling wrap from a drawer. she brought this and her catch into the living room, flicking on the tv to the morning cartoons before rolling out the cling film and plonking the hare on top.
"time to get to work" she exclaimed with a smile.

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a/n: wowowow!!!! nearly at 1k guys! thank you to everyone reading this - keep it up!! had a bit of a slump writing but we back. was gonna make this entire scene 1 chapter but it was getting long and i thought it'd be less confusing if i split it up. this may seem like a bit of a filler but i Promise it's got a juicy patrick plot point hehe. also #8 in #eddiekaspbrak thank u!!! keep reading, voting and commenting yall! tell me things u wanna see !