the captured red hibiscus flower (editing)

please

        after my an hour or so of my warm shower I reluctently hopped out of the warmth embrace, slipping on my undergarments I examined the clothes tamara brought me. dark blue pre ripped skinny jeans around my size, a maroon colour tank top with a lose white laced sweater, and a long gray cardigian, a long gold key necklace and knee high brown boots. wow! tamara has a sense of style.

         I put the clothes on and walked out of the restroom, I must have not been paying attention to were i was going because, I bumped into asher's tall frame.

"oh, opps. sorry I guess i wasn't paying attention to were I was going."

        he looked up from his iphone and chuclked "no, no. you're fine, I was the one not paying attention and I bumped into you. i'm so sorry." I smiled kindly at him "it's ok. um I think tamara was going to show me to the room i'm staying in, um do you know where she is?"

         he looked as if he wastrying to remember where he last saw Tamara. "um yea, I think she mentioned that she needed to run out and grab a few things for the church. and to call her once you were out of the shower. I just texted her, she'll be back in ten minutes. do you want me to just show you to the nursury instead? when she say ten minutes it could mean from ten minutes to 30 minutes."

         I smiled and nodded. He guided me down the small hallway, until we reached a small brown door that read nursury. he smiled opening the door "well here you are. tamara has already set it up for you. just try and ignore the winnie the pooh bear wall paper." he chuckled lightly I nodded making my way over to the nicley made air mattress in the corner of the room. "ok will do" wow tamara you really out did yourself.

        Asher turned to leave, but suddenly stopped. He let out a deep sigh before turning back around and facing me again. "um Alexis, somthing has been bothering me since I saw you in the woods earlier. I know i shouldn't ask but- and I'm sorry if this sounds rude and insensitive. but I was wondering how you got that cut on your cheek and neck and I also was wondering if you cut 'Worthless' on your arm. because well I just want you to know, you Don't need to feel that way, I know it might not be much but i don't think you're worthless, you're speical. even though you may feel alone, like no one cares well i know that God loves you oh so very much. and I know it might not feel like that now, for whatever situation you're in. but He does Care. I care and-" he trailed on

        my heart raced with fear as the memories returned into my thoughts. I was on the verge of tears, If i didn't stop him from going on I would burst out in tears. I needed to steer him away from digging closer. "asher. asher. Asher!" he looked at me puzzled "what?" I took a deep breath "the cut on my cheek, neck and shoulder, were cause when I tripped and fell on to shards of shattered glass. the 'worthless' on my Arm is self-inflicted. there were some problems at home, and one day i just took it out on myself. but it's better now so end of story. can you plz drop it and a-and leave me alone." I lied curtly

         He brushed it off as if he was expecting that answer. "sorry. I know it was rude of me to ask. but it was also rude of you to lie"

ok woah, that definatly caught me off guard. "what! why would you accuse me of lying?"

He deeply sighed, with a heavy heart "because I once myself was a cutter..." My jaw dropped Asher continued as he walked over to the air matress and sat down.

"yes, I know. I don't fit the sterotype and my arms look perfectly fine. well when i was a cutter I was good at hiding, my cuts. but that's not the point, the point is a cut is never perfectly cut into the skin, it is usally rough and rigid. espically the first cut. And normally the first cut is just that a simple cut to ease the emotional or physical pain. but not a perfectly cut eight letter word, such as 'worthless'.