cigarettes & coffee / l.h.

eight

- luke -

When Violet kissed me, I held my breath. That's the first thing I remembered about that moment. 

The second thing I remembered was Violet pulling away and taking a painfully large step away from me. 

"Shit." She muttered and I was still holding my breath. "I'm so sorry."

That's when I realised that Violet had just kissed me, and I hadn't kissed her back. And now she thought that I didn't want to kiss her back. And I needed her to know that I did want to kiss her back. So I stepped closer to her and reconnected our lips.

That time I didn't hold my breath or tense up, and neither did she. I lead her towards the wall and gently pushed her up against it, moving my lips down her neck. Her soft hands tugged at the ends of my hair as I moved my own around her waist. I placed my lips back on hers and managed to push away the thought that she had a boyfriend. But it became obvious Violet couldn't ignore that fact.

"Wait, Luke." She mumbled against my lips, pushing me away slightly. I moved my head away from her and sighed. And I already missed the taste of her strawberry chapstick and the smell of her coconut shampoo.

"Luke." Violet repeated.

"Violet." I mocked her stern voice.

She rolled her eyes and smacked my arm. "Luke, what are we gonna do?"

"You mean what are you going to do about your boyfriend?" I groaned, starting to get stressed about this whole situation.

"Don't be a douche, holy shit." She sounded pissed now and I knew I had to be careful about what I said next.

"What do you want to do, Violet?" I said softly, brushing some hair from her face.

She looked to the ground, and when she looked back up at me I could see tears brimming in her eyes. I pulled her into my arms and held her tightly. I knew I loved her and no matter how much of a cliché it was, it really hurt me to see her like this.

"I don't think about Calum the way I think about you." She let out a breath, but I held mine again.

She looked up at me from our embrace. "Do you understand what I mean?" 

"Yeah." Violet actually had feelings for me, and I was trying so hard to contain how good that made me feel.

"So I guess I'll tell Calum that." She said slowly. "But, he's one of my best friends."

"If we want to be together, you will have to tell him the truth." I told her, keeping my voice quiet.

"You're right. When should I tell him? Oh, God." She hit her head on my chest in frustration and I bit back a smile. She liked me.

"As soon as possible?" I suggested, I couldn't stand the thought of her having a boyfriend for much longer.

"It's gonna be so awkward, Luke." She sighed, rubbing her palm over her forehead.

"Violet, no matter what happens, you've got me. If everything in the world went wrong you'd still have me." I almost cringed at myself, but everything I said was true – I was always going to be there for Violet.

I watched Violet smile gratefully and check the time on her phone, my heart sped up at the sight of her lockscreen – one of the first photos we got together. We were getting ready for a Panic! At The Disco concert and we forced Cassie to take a copious amount of photos of us. Of all of the photos, only a couple were actually decent. 

"That was so much fun." I said quietly, referring to the memories that the photo on Violet's phone held.

"Yeah. We look so cute." She laughed, and we did look cute. We looked like a couple and it made me so unbelievably happy. "Anyway, it's four in the morning. Calum will be awake in like three or four hours, so I have three or four hours to prepare for ruining our friendship and maybe even my friendship with Keira and Michael."