SongWriter Book Series

1: 97'

Jan. 15.1997

I was always in the studio. Almost done with this collab album with Donald and I was working on my project that I was working now. but I will drop that sometime in the mid summer. I felt like I had to keep my mind off of Tupac. It been a few weeks since his death and I felt like I couldn't live without him, he was everything too me. Just amazing person to be around. Just weird that he is not here anymore. I still feel him around me. He did promise to always be there for me.

"You been in here for days. You want a break?" Devante kiss my cheek.

Yes Devante knows about the baby. He was mad but we are still getting thru this rough patch. And im glad he is still by my side because I do really love him. 

I smile. "Yeah, thanks." I told him.

"Is the baby okay?" De ask me

"Yes. The baby is fine. Thank you." I smiled, he kissed my cheek once more.

"You want me to cook something?" Devante ask me.

"Its up too you Donald. You don't have too." I explain.

"Okay, I can order some pizza." Devante told me. I started to laugh.

"Yeah that's cool."

Devante walk out of the studio and order the pizza.

I had a phone call.

"Hey Serenity this is usher."

"Hey Usher, whats going on?" I ask him.

"Well I want to see if you want to hop onto this track with me. I know you would be dope on it." Usher explain and I smile.

"Sure, when do you want me to stop by?" I ask him.

"Tomorrow?" Usher ask me.

"Yeah, I'm free." I told him.

"Alright cool, I see you tomorrow." Usher said before ending the call.

Just to let you know, we didn't tell no one about the baby because I want it to be private until the time comes. Of course I told him mom but no one else doesn't know. 

-

"You good?" Devante ask me.

"Yeah I am good." I lied too him.

"Baby, you don't have to lie. You can tell me how you feeling." Devante explain.

"If I told you that I'm good.... then I am good. You don't have to worry about lil ole me." I told him.

He nodded his head. "After pac's death you are not the same. And I'm trying to be a great boyfriend but you keep on pushing me away." Devante told me.

"......"

"Did You love him?" Devante ask me.

"Yes, yes I did." I told him before getting up.

"Aye don't walk away from me. I'm not done with this conversation." Devante told me.

"But I am." I close and lock the door to my room.

Devante was banging on the door and I just cried on the bed.

"Let me in. We need to talk. You cant be pushing me away like this. You need me." Devante said.

unlock the door. "I know I need you Devante. But I can't go back and change things. We both knew what we was doing. You just have to deal with it. If not when we shouldn't be together." I told him.