Shock And Awe

A Better Understanding

A/N: Please note that other triggering content (self-harm and suicide will be discussed) throughout the story. Please be forewarned and take precautions if these are troubling for you. – This is one of those "triggering" chapters.

I just wanted to thank everyone for the reviews and votes. My muse and I both appreciate it. This is still, as of now, planned to be a fairly long, multi-part story, but if you all aren't into it...I'll wrap it up before too long.

And remember...reviews and votes keep me and my muse motivated...especially if they're positive!!!

***More drama and more secrets revealed***

I hope you enjoy this latest chapter...Now on with the show!!!

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"Looking back, I sometimes wish I had done things differently. But if I had, I'm not sure that I wouldn't have proven to be my own worst enemy." ~ Michael McDonald

"Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it." ~ George Santayana

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Chapter 39

"It was the closest thing to normal I could find, Mattie. Then when my mom got a new posting in back in the States...all of us...my aunt and uncle...their kids...Chance and I...we all moved back to the States too. I started going to school there...Chance was enrolled in a pre-K and their kids were enrolled in school there too. My parents said something about moving back in with them...but I decided to stay with my aunt and uncle most of the time. I just had to show up at my parent's place for special events and dinners...you know...to put in an appearance. I ended up living with my aunt and uncle until I went to College. I still came back to their place on the weekends and any other time I could so that I could spend as much time with Chance as possible."

"Sounds like you ended up being really close with them. Are you still close to them now?" Mattie asked.

"Yeah...for the most part. I'm definitely closer to them than I am my parents. Being there for as long as Chance and I were there, spending time with them, I was able to get to know them a lot better. Before I was dropped off on their doorstep...I didn't really know either one of them. All I ever knew about them before all of that happened were the stories I would occasionally hear from my father once in a while. Then...I found out a few months after you left that my grandmother had disowned my uncle...that was one of the main reasons I didn't know them very well...because he chose his wife over his family and fortune." I explain.

"Your grandmother really disowned her own son...because of his wife?" Mattie asks...shocked.

"Yeah...sounds like a wonderful woman, doesn't she? Almost makes me want to nominate the Ambassador for mother of the year." I sarcastically reply...then shake my head...as if something I've just said reminded me of some other conversation.

"What is it Em?" Mattie asks.

Then I remember...Lucas...taunting me about Chance and Summer...about not acknowledging them or being around them when they were growing up. He said that I would never be nominated for any kind of mother of the year award. I shake my head once more...trying to focus my thoughts.

"Sorry about that...just remembering something Lucas said to me right before I got lost in my head...that's all. Now...where was I...oh...that's right...my fairy godmother...the grand-bitch that caused most of my family drama." I reply.