Shock And Awe

Afterlife?

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"Guilt is perhaps the most painful companion of death." ~ Coco Chanel

"Our life is made by the death of others." ~ Leonardo Da Vinci

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Chapter 2

As I start to walk over to my desk, I pass Garcia. She gives me a small smile and walks into Hotch's office. I'm not entirely sure if she is going in there to talk about me or a case. Either way, she seems to be missing her usual spark. Definitely not looking like it's going to be a good day.

I look up as I make my way to my desk, noticing JJ is leaning against my desk waiting for me. God she is beautiful. I try to school my features as I calmly make my way to my desk. As I sit down in my chair, I look up and notice Rossi sitting by himself near the coffee maker. I make a mental note to speak with him later. Something seems off with him this morning, though I'm not sure now whether that has to do with his newly rekindled relationship with Caroline, or with what I just found out from Hotch.

"Hey Em, how was your weekend?" JJ quietly asks.

"It was good. You?" I reply, glancing up to meet her eyes. Nope, shouldn't have done that. Those beautiful blue eyes catch mine as she smiles at me. I swear, between her eyes and that smile, I don't know if my heart can take it.

"It was good. I tried to call you a couple of times. I was hoping we could get together, but I kept getting your voicemail" she said, a hint of sadness in her voice.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. I saw that you called, but didn't get a chance to call you back. I knew it wasn't about work, since you always text me if it has something to do with a case" I reply. I heard the phone ringing every time, but couldn't make myself answer it. I knew she wouldn't leave a message unless it was about work. I just wasn't up to talking to her. Between everything that was going on this weekend, and how I feel about her, it was easier and safer for both of us that way. Plus, I was being a coward.

"Maybe if we don't get a case today, do you wanna go for drinks after work?" She asks.

I avoid answering her directly, and point out the conversation between Garcia and Hotch. "Well, by the looks of that conversation, I'm guessing we have a case."

I would love to go out for drinks with her, but I can't. Being around her just reminds me of how close we used to be, and how we aren't anymore. God, she is absolutely stunning today. Propped up against my desk; I wonder if she realizes the affect she has on me? She probably does. I wonder sometimes if she gets off by purposely turning me on whenever she can? I shake my head clear of my rambling thoughts when I realize she has started talking. So I try to once again to school my features and focus on the conversation, instead of the skirt she is wearing, which has started sliding up her slightly parted legs on my desk.

"I so don't miss that face. No matter how many cases we solve, there's always more" JJ quietly states.

"Insert Dr. Reid's statistic about active serial killers at any given time here" I interject.

"Reid?" JJ whistles to get Reid's attention. "Spencer..."

"There's something wrong" Reid quietly replies.