Her Broken Heart

1

It's been 5 years since Faith died Josie thinks I'm her mom and I don't mind because I would have been her good mom any way I just wish it wasn't like this I'm now a model but my photographer is a woman I'm terrified of men I can't be around them I get panic attacks if a guy get's to close to me Josie has experienced my panic attacks before she's been the one to stop my panic attacks well her and April, April is my best friend I met her 2 years ago I was picking Josie up from school when this guy started talking to me I stared having a panic attack and April helped me through it we've been friends since then

"Mommy"

"Yes"

"You promised I could have friends over"

"I know"

"Did you forget again"

"No Josie they'll be here around lunchtime"

"When's lunch"

"In an hour"

"But I'm bored now"

"Hmm how about we go into my art room and paint"

"Really can I draw a rose"

"You can draw anything you want"

We walked into my art room I set up a small easel for when I grabbed some paint brushes for us to use and some paint I changed her clothes into one of my old big shirts I put on a T-shirt and some boxers I use for when I'm painting I grabbed two stools for us hers is pink and says princess on it and mine is purple and says queen on it sine Pink is her favorite color and purple is my favorite color I turned my easel to face her and I decided to paint her I started with her head then her eyes which was always the hardest part for me I did the nose and the eyes when I finished her face I worked on her skin tone and gently colored in her blue eyes when I was done I set it aside to dry I turned to see an angry pout on Josie's face

"Mommy I can't draw like you"

"Practice makes better I'll teach you"

I grabbed her hand that had the brush in it and guided her hand showing her how to draw a rose when we were done I dipped the brush in red paint and we colored it in I set it aside to dry I looked at the clock to see we have ten minutes before her friends come

"come on Josie let's get you cleaned"

"But I want to paint some more"

"Not now your friends should be here soon"

I grabbed her hand and guided her to her room I undressed her to take her a warm bath I gently washed her and then washed her hair when I was done I dried her completely got her dress and braided her hair in a fishtail braid I added a pink bow in her hair then walked in my room I took a quick shower then washed my hair when I was done I put on my Nike outfit and put my hair in a bun when I was done I walked in the living room to see Josie watching Rapunzel I set next to her to see the part where Rapunzel gets kidnapped as a baby I was too into the movie I didn't notice someone knock on the door

"Mommy"

"Yeah"

"Someone's at the door"

I stood up and looked out the peephole to see April with her daughter I opened it and greeted them letting them in "Darla! You came" I looked to see Josie smiling at Darla I looked at the door to see a little boy smiling at me

"hi I'm Lincoln this is my uncle Sebastian sorry my daddy couldn't come he had lots of work to do he's always busy he shoots bad people"

"So he's a cop"

"No"

"Uh okay"

I looked up to see the man too close I backed away not liking him being that close to me I didn't think this was a good idea I assumed all the moms would bring the kids I didn't think any men would come without knowing I started panicking the man tried to get closer to me until Josie pushed him away

"GET AWAY FROM MY MOMMY"

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to frighten you I can leave my nephew with you and come back when it's time if you're  more comfortable with that"

I looked up at him and shakily nodded my head when he left I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding I don't know what I would do without Josie how she is so strong yet I'm so weak and she's only five I wish I had her strength but It's all because of that man that I'm this way if it wasn't for him I would be stronger but I couldn't get stop thinking about that man who was nice enough to leave instead of stay knowing how scared I am most men stay or try hard to get my attention but him he walked away I can't get his stormy blue eyes out of my head I walked in the house and sat on the couch I watched as Josie runs around the house playing with the kids

Soon everyone had left now it was just me Josie and Lincoln I didn't know when his uncle was coming so I ordered pizza while we were waiting I turned on Spider-Man then walked into my room and changed into my night clothes I walked into the living room and was about to sit down when the doorbell rang I opened it to see the pizza guy I paid for the pizza then set the pizza on the table I grabbed plates for and called them in for dinner we all sat down and ate quietly when we were done I let them finish watching their movie while I clean the kitchen

As I was drying the dishes I washed someone knocked on the door I looked over at the couch to see Lincoln and Josie sleeping I opened the door to see that guy I opened the door letting him in I gently picked Lincoln up and handed him to Sebastian "how did you get him to sleep so quickly it usually takes us hours to get him down"

"pizza and Spider-Man"

"Well thank you..."

"Oh Avalon"

"Well thank you, Avalon"

"Your welcome"

Once he left I picked up Josie and laid her down in her bed I turned her light off and walked into my room I laid down and closed my eyes to a dreamless sleep