When I Say, I Love You...

Chapter 38

As soon as Susanne told Michael what had happened he was down there in a day sitting at Aaliyah' s bed side as she slept . He held her frail hand and mindlessly twisted her wedding Band and her wedding around her ring finger. She had,lost so,much weight in that past month. No one really notice until her accident.

Michael didn't understand why she didn't tell her about her problems. If it wasn't for Kiara and Keisha, she would've died, and Michael hated seeing her hurt. He hated being away from her in the first place and to hear that she almost died from blood lost really hurt him to. He wasn't told why she lost so much blood IR what caused it he wasn't yet ready to hear why. He just sat at the side of her bed staring at his sleeping wife. He soon started to wonderwhat she would say if she knew he was here. What she would say. Then she heard her voice come over him"' Baby, what the well are you doing back? You need to go back so you can entertain those fans of yours not sitting on your ads doing nothing.'" He chuckled.

" Loyal." He whispered. Something that he always did when she cursed.

Then she pictured her rolling eyes." Don't you Loyal me.'" She would say.

Then he started to wonder what colors her eyes would be. It was Wednesday so it would be hazel. He longed for her to open her eyes for him to see her hazel Brown eyes.Just then Janet walked in the room with a smile." How are you?"

Michael shrugged mindlessly." I done know, fine I guess."

Janet put his arm around her brother." She'll be fine." She whispered.

He nodded." What,happened."

She look down at him as if she was shocked to hear what she had just heard. " Umm," she hesitated she didn't want to be the one to tell him that he almost became a father. It would crush his soul.

" What happened Jan?" He asked, this time more sternly.

" She had been having some bad cramps and when Kiara and Keisha had went to her house, she was cramping really bad, so when they helped her up to take her here, the saw her losing slot of blood. When she got here the doctors told Susanne she..." she let her sentence trail

" she what?"

She hesitated again."S-she had a miscarriage." She said in a faint whisper.

Michael looked up at her then down at Aaliyah who still was a sleep." What?"

" Im sorry Mike." She said.

Tears started to fill his eyes." She probably didn't she was pregnant, but theres more to it." She sat down on the chair next to him." The doctor says the reason she miscarried was because her body wasn't strong enough to go through the changes of the pregnancy. And that she lost so much blood that she could've died. And she said that she may not be able to carry anymore kids, because her body doesn't know how to handle the pregnancy."

Tears was running down Michael's face." She cant have kids?" He asked.

" she cant carry the child for more then a month." She simply said.

" How could-"

" I didn't know, I swear." The both turned to see Aaliyah staring at them." I swear I had no idea." She Said again, her voice was in a raspy whisper.

Michael grabbed her hand again and then kissed her on her forehead." Its okay baby."

She shook her head slowly." I should've known. I just was...naive I guess."

Baby you had know way of knowing."

" Yes I did, all the signs were there, I just ignored them, I was denial." She let out a yawn. And then continued." If I would've known my baby would tell be here, it would still be alive. This is all my fault."

" No Layla, it isn't your fault."

" Yes it is."

" No its not, your body just couldn't handle the pregnancy. You cant control that."

She didn't say anything she just looked another direction, trying not to show the tears rolling down her face.

" You,shouldn't blame yourself, baby." Michael said, as he stocked her cheek.

She moved her head away from his touch." I should've known."

" Well why didn't you tell me baby, I would've flown home sooner."

" I didn't want to worry you." She said, still not meeting his gaze. She kept staring ahead." He was so beautiful." She whispered.

Michael and Janet stared at each other." He?"

She nodded her head." Don't think im crazy because im not, my mother came to me in my dreams, she had a little boy on her arms, he looked like you, Michael." She turned her head to Michael. Then looked back up at the ceiling." I think im delirious in a way, but I done know. I just wish I could have had the change to hold him. Now, I cant have any kids to experience that, and its my fault."

" Baby you never know, the doctor could be wrong."

" The doctor said that there is a 75 percent chance ill be able tocarry a child through the whole pregnancy." She protested.

" Baby if you have faith, you will."

She looked at him not really knowing what to say. Her eyes began to feel heavy. She rubbed her eyes." I done know what I have right now."

" Yes you do Layla." Janet said." You have love."

She didn't answer be,wise she had already fallen back asleep. Michael looked at Janet.

" Its okay she' s just sleep its the medication."

Michael let out a sigh of relief he kissed her on her forehead and then walked out the room.