Finding Meaning

Chapter 20

"Hey." Jon said, waving his hand to greet Hadasaphorus.

"Wassup." Hadasaphorus responded. "Are we really starting a cult?"

"Yeah, unless you want to be tortured forever."

"Well, needless to say, I don't."

"Obviously."

"Okay, how are we going to do this? Flyers?" Hadasaphorus asked.

"Flyers? Are you serious? You want to post flyers for a suicide cult?"

"Well, kinda. Sorta. We'll post flyers for a missing dog or something and on the back will be the cult stuff."

"That works."

"We can also advertise online."

"Okay, but for both we can't mention anything about the suicide aspect." Jon had a good point.

"But then how will they know?" Hadasaphorus asked. Another good point. "We can't just be like 'Surprise! You're dying tonight.'"

"Um, we can maybe put my phone number on the flyer and it can say 'Call for more information.'"

"More information on a missing dog? That makes no sense."

"What if the flyers had no pictures and we put something like 'The dog doesn't like photos taken of him.'" Jon started.

"Yeah, yeah!" Hadasaphorus interrupted, excitedly. "And when they call about the dog, we can tell them about our cult."

"That'll be a lot of calling."

"Let's maybe use both numbers so we split the work in half."

"Okay."

And, so they tediously crafted flyers online. It took a while because they couldn't agree on the color (ironically) or the font. Finally, though, a simple Times New Romans font was agreed upon. At the top center of the page, in big, bold orange text, it read, "Missing Dog."

Underneath the text, closer to the center of the page, there was a rather large text box that read, in red, "Picture not available." And, to continue, there was a provided explanation. "Our dog, Hidey, likes to hide. We keep losing her and we love her so much. Unfortunately, though, she doesn't like cameras or phones or pictures. So, we have no pictures of her. Please call for more information."

Below the text box, in black, bold Times New Romans were both our names, first and last, with our phone numbers next to them.

We ended up printing many, many copies of the flyers, hanging them up on trees, boards, the local laundromat, and a few bus stops.

"That should do it!" Hadasaphorus sung proudly as he pasted the last flyer on an oak tree. "Now we wait."

And so, they did. Because Hadasaphorus doesn't actually live anywhere near Jon, technically homeless for the past few days, he crashed at Jon's house.