Misery [T. Higgs] ✔

tirelessly

Helena is back at Hogwarts for her last year. The bags under her eyes are so dark, one could think somebody had brutally punched her at least thrice.
She barely slept anymore. The news of Sirius Black being innocent had finally reached the castle two days ago and Severus Snape of course asked her about it. She even gave him her memory of that evening just to see for himself until he was convinced.

By day now she was studying like a madwoman. Always going out of her way to go out of her younger brothers way. Even going as far as simply joining her father in the classroom for a bit of chocolate and a few extra lessons, joining Snape in his office for a cup of coffee and a long talk about potions and what they could experiment with to give them a higher potency or joining Draco and his friends, sitting with them in the backyard. Allowing the blonde haired boy who, following her advice no longer used hairgel, rest in her lap as she studies her notes. At night however Helena and her father had started their search for Sirius Black, who, without a doubt, had yet to learn that everyone already knew he was innocent.

The most sleep she had gotten those nights was 2 hours. And to top it all off, full moon was getting closer and her father more protective.

It was the evening on a full moon night. The first full moon of the school year. Helena is standing between her father and Snape, who shakes his head. "She can't just walk out with you! You could injure her!" "Helena is my daughter. Therefore my responsibility. You have no say in this, Severus!" "Why you..." "Severus.", Helena quietly says, making her father stare at her in confusion at the informal addressing. "I am his pup in his eyes. He'd be more likely to tear anything apart that even as much as breathes in my direction than harm me in any way. With or without potion I am always safe with my dad. I have been going outside with him since I was young. Because of that he stopped scratching himself so badly.. I want to go. Don't worry. I'll be back without a scratch." Severus Snape stares her down for a few minutes, then nods with a sigh. Placing his hand on her curls and gently ruffling her hair. "Be careful." Helena takes her fathers hand and they quickly make their way outside into the cool night air. The clouds covering the moon travel further east with the wind and the soft luminous glow covers their two siluettes. She watches the transformation and soon stands face to face with her fathers werewolf self. He sniffs her before letting out a gutteral sound that's that of welcoming his pup. She knows it well and learned to imitate it to greet back. So she does. He sniffs her. Immensely interested. That when they hear barking and then a growl. A large black dog tries to grab her but her father immediately protectively covers her. Snarling and snapping his teeth at the dog. His claws ready to tear into flesh. "Sirius. Its okay. I am his pup. He won't hurt me. Go to the shrieking shack. I'll be right behind you." The dog looks at her in shock and confusion, then runs off. Helena calmly walks after him, her father following her closely. Her eyes spy a nice fat bunny. And with a low growl she alerts him of her discovery. Immediately he hunts it down, devouring it. With his appetite stilled he is calm and relatively docile. Falling asleep in the shrieking shack with Helena wrapped up in his body. Sirius Black hesitantly enters the room. In his human form. "Sirius. I want you to read this. Please." Helena pulls out the daily prophet article that was published about his innocence. She hands it over. His eyes widen as he reads. "You.. You testified for me. You rehabilitated me?" Helena nods and smiles. "Sirius. I saw you that night. I knew it couldn't have been you who betrayed us and told Voldemort our location. I just didn't know they arrested you. Me and dad never spoke about that and I only learned about it when I read about you escaping in the daily prophet.", Helena says in a soft voice. Tears spill from her eyes. "I'm so sorry you had to suffer 12 years because of all of this." Sirius too cries. He carefully and cautiously scoots over and they embrace. She hugs his horrible smelling self close to her chest. "Tomorrow morning you'll come with me and dad to the castle. Get a bath and some fresh clothes." "You said dad. Two times.." "Remus adopted me. I am sick, Sirius. Very sick. My sadness, worry and grief over my parents death was like cancer. My heart has started to self destruct. I lost one heart valve already. And if I'm honest.. Back then I wished I had died with my parents. If I am faced with those emotions it starts to destroy itself again. Having Remus saved me. He became my dad by making all those nightmares and the pain go away. He let me sleep in his bed and cry in his arms if I needed to. And his werewolf side immediately took me on as its pup as well. I've been outside with him since I started living with him. Don't worry. I am completely safe." "And Harry?" "Is here. He lives with my mother's sister and her husband and son. Horrible muggles. But.. We don't speak. Not anymore." "Why?" "In our first year he almost got himself killed by Voldemort who, like a parasite, lived on the back of one of my teachers head. I killed my teacher and Voldemorts temporary body was destroyed. And last year he ran into the chamber of secrets, tried to battle a horcrux and got bitten by the monster in the chamber. A basilisk. If not for Dumbledores phoenix he would have died. I worry about him a lot because of his recklessness. My chest pain started to appear again. I can't afford to die. I have to be alive and well for dad, my friends and of course for Terence. My fiance. I can't afford to spend time with him. Because he honestly seems to not even care." Sirius takes her soft hands in his. Helena Lily Potter. The little girl he held on his arm was dying. So close to dying. "I am here for you, if you ever need me." "And I am always here for you, Sirius. Because I have much time to make up for. Time that I should have been able to see you every day."