- goop cast // one shots x reader -

[02] jschlatt

Title;
honestly this is so fucking dumb,
i'm ok with you guys hating it.

y/n P.O.V

"fuck off!" i screamed into my terrible mic at the boy who was chasing me in this dumb block game.

"y/n, just buy the fucking schlatt coin and i'll leave you alone," the scary salesmen wasn't giving up, causing me to erupt into laughter. so fucking dumb, the things i do for this man. i still don't understand why he wanted me to join the server, i mean i'm thankful he did it's nice meeting his friends.

"i'm poor, what the fuck do i pay you in?" he goes silent, making me suspicious of his next choice of words or actions. what is this dumb bitch going to do or say? "hello? whore, you there?"

an evil laugh followed my last words, his dumb evil laugh. literal piss baby laugh.

another person joins the discord server, connor. his co-worker. these little shits, what are they up to?

"ahhh, i see. y/n, it seems you are poor. we're here to make an agreement." the jah headed man joined us at the place i had been cornered to. "now, since you've just started on this server we'll give you a choice, a compromise if you will,"

"i don't feel safe," my chat was telling me to be careful, to not trust these hooligans. they take these bits very far, but lsf amirite? "are you going to tell me or what?"

"ok so, i'm exchange for ONE schlatt coin you will give us all the diamonds you find within the next week." the little shit with a tux on spoke, with high hopes. they think i'll find diamonds? there business mustn't be doing all that well if they're putting their trust into my mining expertise.

"that doesn't sound fair," both of their blocky characters turned slowly towards mine, genuinely i feel threatened by two idiots that scam people on minecraft for a living. "ok maybe it does"

"that's what i fucking thought" my ears had been destroyed by the sound of what chat likes to call, 'funny mic'. i never realised it was this bad holy fuck. i could even hear connor gasp out of shock not expecting the dumb ass to do funny mic.

"jesus fucking christ, please my ears" my begging was no help as schlatt continued yelling random phrases at me in loud language.

chat was blowing up with different assortments of emotes, mainly being taken over by the dumb one where they make it look like they're closing their ears. fucking simps.

"chat please help me!"

"they can't save you" schlatt very quickly responded to my cry for help, some would think something worse was happening to me.

"NOW, you have accepted our exchange. your coin will be given to you when it's ready" a very cheery connor spoke up.

"what the fuck do you mean when it's ready?"

i was left with no response as quite quickly connor disappeared from the game and discord. i have no say in this, why does it have to be ready, my brain.

"schlatt, when will it be ready?"

"well, you'll see."

"what does that- you know what nevermind i'll just go along with whatever's happening"

"exactly right, you will abide by the laws of schlatt n co."

"you take this minecraft thing very seriously don't you?" i said whilst making my way back towards spawn so i could go through the nether realm.

"hey! it's not a 'minecraft thing' it's serious. i'm upping your price now."

"what the fuck, that's illegal"

"don't care, a month of your diamonds" i could hear the smirk in his voice.

i stood up out of my chair, throwing my headset down towards my keyboard, i could already tell schlatt heard as his little character started running.

i raced down the steps towards his office, bouta smack this dumb pissy boy.

"ONE MONTH OF DIAMONDS, NO WAY. FUCK YOU" i slammed his door wide open causing him to jump, then start screaming his stupid comedic scream that makes me die in laughter every time. i could see his chat on his other monitor spamming pepelaugh. they know it's coming. "CHAT JUST SO YOU KNOW SCHLATTS GETTING A BEATING"

"no, please!" he screamed at me. causing both of us to start cackling. "2 months?"

"TWO MONTHS?"

- end