My Player

Part 2

Noah's POV

I hear my alarm from my phone blaring in my ear as I groan awake. I turn my alarm off and slowly sit up, rubbing my eyes. I make my way out of bed and head to the bathroom that's right across from my bedroom.

I look into the mirror with disgust and quickly turn away and start the shower water. I step in and let the water consume me. The water runs down my body as my head is down, letting my thoughts take over.

Im not enough.

Not skinny enough.

Not cute enough.

Not.

Enough.

I let my tears mix with the water as my light brown hair covers my peripheral vision.

As I continue to think about Liam. I start to sob. I start to sob into my hands the thoughts consuming my body.

It's usually not this bad in the morning but I just had to look in the mirror. I had to see my disgusting reflection that no one could ever love.

I start to wash up, hating every second of touching my body and occasionally tracing over the scars on my wrists. When I get done I start washing my hair. I just wish I could wash all of the thoughts away.

When I'm done I step out and cover myself with my towel. I go back to my room with tired, puffy, red eyes. I grab my clothes, black ripped skinny jeans, a white t-shirt, and a black oversized hoodie with the word "love" in white, written in cursive, going across it.

I dry off my hair with my towel, still ending up damp. I grab my backpack and go downstairs.

My parents aren't home when I'm awake, as if they even care about me. They only acknowledge me when other people are here. They know I'm gay but they don't care. By 'don't care' I don't mean it in a supportive way I mean it as, they don't care they don't want to see or talk about it.

I skip breakfast and just head outside to my bus stop. As I'm waiting in the cold fall morning weather I get a text from Liam, making me smile.

Liam🖤: Hey good morning Noah I just wanted to check in on you. How are you doing?

I smile even more as I read his text but responded with a lie.

Me: I'm doing fine thanks for asking. I'll see you at school.

Liam🖤: No problem I'll see you later.

I put away my phone as I see my bus arrive. I step onto the bus and sit in the first open seat. I try to drown out all of the noise but one voice gets to me.

"Hey, babe."

I stiffen up as I feel the someone sit next to me.

Mason.

Mason is, well, not my bully but he does harass me, quite often. Sexual harassment.

I don't look at him as I try to ignore him.

"Oh come on, babe, don't be like that." He says pushing my shoulder back, making me turn to him, "There's that pretty face." He places his hand on my cheek, making me jolt back.

"That's not nice, babe." He forcefully grabs my wrist making me wince.
"Now what do we say when we're naughty."

I mumble under my breath inaudible to him.

"Speak up, babe." He squeezes my wrist even tighter, I wince and hiss in pain.

"I'm sorry I won't do it again." I say quickly but his grip only tightens.

"Ah, ah, ah, what's my name?"

"I'm sorry I won't do it again, sir." He removed his hand.

"Good boy," he moves closer to my ear as I freeze up, "I don't want to have to do that again. Especially to a slut like you, I won't show you mercy, got it?" He whispered harshly into my ear and I just nodded out of fear.

"Good boy. Looks like you're learning." He gets up and leaves.

I'm still in shock in my seat as stray tears roll out of my already red eyes.

I wipe them away and pull up my sleeve to see a red-ish blue-ish mark. I gently trace my finger tips over it and immediately wince and pull back. I pull my sleeve back up.

The worst part about Mason is, he's one of Liam's friends.

When we arrive at school I go straight to the bathroom, forgetting about Liam. I lock myself in one of the stalls and start crying silently. The type of silent cry that hurts the most. I go in my bag and grab my razor.

Mason's right. I cut once.

I'm a slut. I cut twice.

I deserve the pain. Three.

I'm nothing. Four.

No one will love me. Five.

I'm disgusting. Six.

Three on each wrist.

I stop and grab some toilet paper and place it over the cuts. Thankfully they weren't big or deep enough to cause a lot of blood.

When I get done drying up the blood I grab my bandages from my bag and put them on. Remember, this is normal. This is my normal.

I get done and leave the bathroom but once I open the door Im met with Liam making out with some chick.

My day is just going so great, that I want to just curl up into a ball and cry.

Note the sarcasm.

I quickly walk past them, not wanting to interrupt, but stopped by someones hand on my wrist. I wince and freeze up, remembering what happened this morning.

"You alright?" It's Liam. I'm guessing he heard me me wince, "I didn't hurt you, did I?" He tries to pull up my sleeve and I quickly turn around.

"I'm fine." I say with a fake smile.

"You sure?" He asks with concern.

No, "Yeah, I'm sure." I lie and readjusted my backpack.

"If you say so. Hey by the way, there's this thing I wanted to-" I cut him off.

"Liam, I have to go. I'm already late and I could see that you were busy," I look behind him and see a sexually frustrated girl waiting by the bathrooms, "so I'll just be going."

"Ok if you say so. I'll see you later." He walks away and goes back over to the girl and starts to kiss her again.

I walk away, heading to my advisory, silently wishing that was me.

Liam's POV

I was rethinking this whole situation, I was with this girl, I forgot her name, and we were headed to the bathrooms when I saw Noah come out with slightly red eyes, I'll have to ask him later about it. Then he just quickly walks away but I stop him before he got to far.

I grabbed his wrist and he freezes up and winces. Did I hurt him?

I just kept wondering if I hurt him or not. I got distracted and just left the bathroom leaving the girl behind me.

Did I hurt him?

Why were his eyes red?

He seemed fine.

Is he okay?

Second chapter done! I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you love Noah as much as I do! Please go easy on Liam if you can😂 I love you my little roses.
Love-Ruby ♥️