Never Again

Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

When I got to P.E my stomach sank. It was a fitness day. I hated fitness with a very strong hatred. Even though I try to do it a lot for my legs and stomach there's just something about doing it in P.E that makes you feel like it's the worst thing in the world. I suppose it just is the fact that you're being watched by other people while doing it and there's just more room for judgment because you might "look weird". I don't mind doing workouts on my own but they're specific to my needs for my body. (Even though they don't really help.) We're always doing things like lunges, sit ups, pushups and running around the basketball courts whereas I do things like leg lifts, bicycles and running on the treadmill. All in all it just doesn't seem to help me, probably because I love food and the constant need for it is a guilty pleasure.

For fitness we had to do a circuit of one-hundred mountain climbers, crunches, jump squats, etc. Autumn and I were partners and started off with crunches.

"You're coming to the practice after school right?" she asked while holding my feet.

I had totally forgotten. Autumn and I were in orchestra together. She played the violin and I played the harp and occasionally the piano. We were playing a duet together for the Christmas concert in December with a flute player and a viola. We were supposed to be practicing after school from three until four.

"Let me guess- you forgot." Autumn said.

"Ummmm... maybe?" I said in a high, guilty voice.

"You didn't make any plans did you?"

"For once, I actually didn't!" I exclaimed and switched places with her.

"No kidding," she muttered.

I blushed. It always makes me feel embarrassed when people mention how I forget things a lot and how it makes me late sometimes. I know they're not criticizing me and telling me I'm stupid, but I just don't like talking about my flaws that affect others. It's one of those things that give the monsters something to feed on and make more marks on me.

After class Willow, Autumn and I headed out to meet some of our other friends in the garden for lunch. The air was cool and sweet. Whenever we ate out in the garden you could just smell the roses that the botany club had taken lots of care to preserve in the cold weather. We sat on the edge of the water fountain and unpacked our food.

My friends usually had things like sandwiches, apple slices, chips and a cookie. That used to be what my lunch was like. But then I realized the consequences of my food addiction and started eating things like salads with a handful of raspberries or carrots. I always brought bottled water and to fulfill my sweet tooth craving- a Fiber One bar. Everything was in small amounts except for my water.

"Elsie, how on earth do you ever have enough to eat?" my friend Candice asked.

I shrugged and continued to eat my salad. I hated it when people commented on how much I ate. Hey, I was just trying to be a bit healthier by eating correct portion sizes and eating slowly to get full faster. I was just trying to keep myself from over eating. My stomach didn't need any more fat than what I already had. I wasn't starving myself, at least I don't think.

When I went to go throw my trash away I stumbled over a large crack in the pavement but I was caught. It was as if I did a trust fall. I was being held by the under arms and it looked like I was sitting on an invisible chair. I was brought back up to a standing position and looked back expecting one of my friends to be there but instead it was that guy, Tyler.

I automatically blushed.

"Uh, thanks," I said.

"No problem," he replied. "That would've hurt pretty badly if you had landed that fall."

"Yeah, I could've been cut."

"And then I'd have to walk you to the nurse," he teased.

That made me blush even more. Luckily a laugh escaped from my throat.

"I'm Tyler by the way," he said.

"I know." I blurted. "I'm Elsie."

He gave me a confused look and then smiled.

"I know," he mocked.

"I think you're in my English class," I said quickly. I was totally lying.

"I'll have to look for you then," he said.

Great, now he was going to find out that I was lying to him and that I didn't really know what his name was and that I just heard it from Willow and that I'm just stupid like that. Arrgh, I stink at talking to boys.

My mad rant inside my head was interrupted by some snickering I heard. I looked over and saw my friends staring at me with mocking faces. Willow was turned around with her hands wrapped around her with her hands moving up in down in a rubbing motion.

I rolled my eyes. Tyler looked behind him and they all waved with cheesy smiles plastered on their faces. He laughed and then turned back to look at me.

"I better go put my lunch in my locker," he said.

"Yeah, thanks for catching me," I replied.

He started to walk away and then turned around. "I'll see you in English!" he called.

I waved and watched him go out the door back into the building. Once he was gone I walked back to my friends. They all were smiling coyly at me.

"What?!" I asked.

"Somebody has a crush!" Willow sang.

"Ha. Ha. Like that'll happen," I said.

Autumn waved her hands in the air and my other friend Tori started humming "Here comes the Bride."

"I can see it now! You're walking down the aisle to face the love of your life- Tyler! Ah! It's so beautiful!" she cheered.

I socked her in the arm.

"Ow! I'm just saying it could happen." She complained.

"Shut up!" I laughed.