| Life of a fraudster | ✔

▪LOAF 8▪

I stood in front of the mirror. I am practicing how I should be acting. "Is it good?" I ask Hadiza who is sitting behind me, folding clothes.

"Yeah, it is very good." She says as I sat down beside her. "What's wrong? You seem down,did Salis screw up again?" I ask her but she shakes her head.

"Nah, I just want to be like you. Act well and then help you with financing the house." Hadiza says looking at me sadly.

"I prefer it this way. I don't want you to be like me. I want you to be the doctor you always wanted, marry someone you really love, have children and save people's lives. Okay? " I ask looking at her.

"Yeah." She replies like she is still not convinced.  "Well,....,". I was cut off when my phone started ringing. It is Mohammad so I picked up the call "Hello? " I ask.

"Hello, um Anisah. How are you doing?' He asks while I helped Hadiza folding a shirt.

"Fine,  thank you. What's up?" I ask as Hadiza tries to eavesdrop. "Yes, my mom wants to meet you. She isn't budging and she demands to see you so I called." He says and I close my eyes.

It seems like it won't be easy dealing with this woman. "Okay, when is it?" I ask scratching my forehead. "Tomorrow." He says.

"Really? Tomorrow? Suddenly she felt like meeting me?" I ask pacing to and fro. "Yeah,  it was like she changed her mind but right now, you need to get ready."

He says as I take a deep breath. "Okay, where and at which time?" I ask rubbing my temple. "The usual place and at 2pm." He says and I nod. 

"Sure, I'll talk to you tomorrow then." I say frustrated. "Okay." He says before I hang up. "What is it?" Hadiza asks looking at me curiously.

I hate showing my siblings that there are problems with my job or that I'm weak. Everyone is counting on me and I don't want to disappoint them.  I don't want them to feel  what I felt, unwanted, useless, a mistake, unloved,  burdened and alone.

"Nothing, just Mohammad telling me about his mom wanting to meet me tomorrow so I have to get ready." I say before taking a deep breath.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" She asks not sure whether to be happy or not. "Bad, not terrible but bad." I say when my phone rang.

I pick it up. "Hello?" I say.  "Hello, this is from winter field school. Are you the Guardian of both Salis and Khadija Bashir?" The man says. "Yes, I am." I say feeling nervous and scared. 

"We would want to talk to you in person if you don't mind?" He asks as I nod. "Sure, I'll be there very soon." I say. "Okay then." The man says before he hangs up.

I hurried inside my closet to pick my hijab. "What is going on?" Hadiza asks confused. "I need to go to Salis's school shaps so please take care of the house while I'm gone."

She nods still confused. I rush to the car and drove out in a hurry. What happened to them? Are they alright?  I thought like a concerned parent but in this case, I am.

I park at the gate and walked inside. "Miss Bashir." A familiar faced teacher waved at a me so I waved back. Most probably a person I know or knew.

I walk to the counselor who wore a suit. Immediately he saw me he stood up with smile. "Good afternoon, my name is Mr Nwanfor Nkem." He says calmly.

'Good Afternoon, What's wrong with the kids?" I ask straight to the point. "Please take a seat first." He say sitting down with a smile. "Okay, what is it?" I say while I nervously played with my fingers.

"They are fine and they are in their classes. I just wanted to inform you about how they are mentally." He says but I couldn't help my heart from missing a beat.

"Okay." I say so he could continue. "I cannot guess or say what is wrong with them but something is worrying them a lot as you can see from the composition we asked him to right about his mother."

He says handing me the paper. 

I don't have a mother, I feel like she left us so she could love a better life.

Salis wrote as the man hands me another paper of Khadija that was left blank.

"We told her to write something about her mother but she said there was no use and kept on crying."

I felt my heart getting heavy as tears welled up. I hung my head,  looking downwards. "Are you alright?" The man asks and I nod.

"Thank you for notifying me, I will deal with it the best way possible." I say standing up smiling. "Okay, thank you for even listening because people don't take mental health seriously."

He says smiling widely. "No problem but can I take them?" I ask and he nods. "Sure, it is only five minutes away." He says looking at his wristwatch.

"Thank you." I say before walking out.

I sit down looking at Abdallah and Hadiza. I told them the problem I was told. "if I leave, don't leave them. Stay close to them because they might be even more affected with this than us."

I say clasping my hands together. They nod as Abdallah scoffs. "Do you really have to go? You heard about this yet you're leaving?" Abdallah says and I glare at him.

"I do, Abdallah.  I have to provide for the house." I say but he shakes his head. "I said I would provide everything so you wouldn't have to get married to a stranger and sleep with him in the same bed. God knows what you're doing."

He says when I stood up with tears in my eyes. "Don't you ever say that to me! I get that you are ungrateful and you can't grasp something simple. You hate something that got you to where you are! I do this for you and you demean it. If you hate it so much then leave!"

I say before walking out. I enter my room panting. I close my eyes trying to be calm but it just gets worse. I look at my hands as it shakes profusely.

I sit down on the bed, sobbing.
******

The door opened as I scrolled through my phone. It was Abdallah but I just ignored him. He walked to the bed and sat. "Ya Anisah? I'm sorry." He says.

"I am being ungrateful while you did a lot for us. I hope you can forgive me." He says and I sit up. "Sure,  I do but don't ever say that again. I really am worried about them but I can't go back. I've already signed the papers with him."

I say taking a deep breath. "I know you always hated the job but you can't hold the family for now. You are earning money,  good but if you are going to take care of this family,  you're going to go broke."

I say and he nods. "I thought about that but it is worth it." He says looking at me. "Just support me because I need it. No man is an island especially us. We need to stick together." I say holding his hand.

"I hate that quote. 'No man is an island' ugh!" He says rolling his eyes as I nudge him. "Get out." I smile, pointing to the door.

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