Life with Hunters

Ch 10 Dead of Winter; the truth slips out

I HATED the job I was doing in the camp. But I didn't tell Jacob or Chester and Cathrine. How could I? I would never be able to explain my reasoning why. My job was to kill special infected that got too close to the camp walls. I didn't hate it because what I had to do specifically. I hated it because of WHAT I had to kill. I still had a sentimental connection with hunters since I had lived with a pack of them for half a year before separating from them. It was the middle of winter now and supplies were being more tightly rationed to get the camp through the cold season where nothing would grow. Greenhouses were still being set up but there weren't enough generators to power them or enough gas for the generators. So we had to rely on old fashioned farming plots made within the camp walls. There had been a decent harvest right before I came in with Cathrine and Chester. But that harvest was being preserved and rationed so last the winter. It was hard to believe it had already been almost a year since the end of the world. 'Time flies...' I thought more often than not now. But it wasn't at the forefront of my mind. What was my prominent of thoughts is the looks I get during work. They've all noticed my hesitation to kill hunters. Someone else would kill them since I would never take the shot, but it still hurt me to see the hunter or hunters die. Jacob was asking a lot of questions about it, but I would always change the subject or tell him I needed to be else where and run away. He was my only friend in the camp, but I don't trust him enough to tell him, answer his questions. He likely wouldn't even believe me if I told him. But I didn't want to be seen as crazy just as much as I didn't want anyone knowing I lived with special infected. If people didn't trust me now, then they sure as hell wouldn't trust me within an inch of their lives if they knew about me and hunters.

       It was another day on the job I had started with Jacob since the specials team needed another person because a previous member had died earlier in the year. The majority of the team kept their distance from me and didn't talk to me. Jacob was the only one that remained close and would even help me if I struggled with my rifle. He was a really talented sniper and part of me strived to be as skilled as he was. But he kept asking me questions and I could feel I was starting to break. No matter how much I avoided the subject he would always find a way to bring it up again at the first opportunity.

    "I really don't know Jacob. Please stop asking me those questions. Repeatedly asking me isn't gonna make me magically have answers." I practically growled at him because he was really getting on my nerves with his persistence.

   "You're gonna need to answer me sooner or later. Because you can't keep hesitating to kill hunters when they come around. You're the second best shot on the team so there's no reason for you to let someone else steal your kill." He was stern in his reply, determined to get me to answer his constant questions.

   "Me being the second best has nothing to do with me hesitating. Don't make connections that aren't even there. And I'm not comfortable answering your questions, so no. I don't have to answer you sooner or later. I don't have to answer you at all." I snapped back at him. He practically glared at me and I returned the nasty look with one of my own. We normally didn't fight so this surprised the rest of the team since Jacob and I always seemed really close. Jacob said nothing more and went back to his work, and I did the same. We didn't speak to each other for the rest of our shift and hardly even said goodbye when our shift ended. We parted ways for the rest of the day after that. I ate alone at dinner that evening in silence. I noticed then how lonely I actually was now that my only friend wasn't talking to me. 'Way to go Emiko... You're alone again...' I sighed as I finished my measly meal of dried deer meat, a piece of bread and water. I left the mess hall tent after returning the tray my food was served on. My plan was to go straight to my tent that I shared with Chester and Cathrine and go right to bed, but that plan got derailed immediately when Jacob came of nowhere, scooped me up onto his shoulder and walked off to a secluded part of the camp with me beating his back and demanding he put me down. He ignored my demands until he got to wherever he wanted to be and dropped me onto the ground, blocking my only way out of the small area he brought me to. I glared at him as I stood up and dusted the dirt off me.

    "What do you want." I crossed my arms while glaring at him. He stood his ground in front of me.

   "You know the answer to that." He replied in a gruff tone. I cursed under my breath. 'He doesn't know when to quit.' I shook my head at him and tried to push past him. He pushed me back easily.

   "Why do you want to know? It's none of your business." I growled.

  "Because it's pretty damn suspicious that every time you have a clear shot at a hunter you don't take said shot." he snapped at me. Okay he did have a point there. 

  "Why does that matter when someone else on the team takes that shot themselves? The job still gets done either way." I barked back at him.  

   "It matters because you're putting everyone here and everything we've all built here at risk every time you hesitate!" He had venom laced in his words. I went silent. He was right. I felt my composure breaking as I chewed on my lip trying to think of something to say. I couldn't tell him the truth, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. But I also had no guarantee he would believe me, much less keep it between him and I. He watched me as I tried to keep my temper while pacing around in a tiny circle in front of him. I only stopped when he grabbed me by the shoulders and looked me dead in the eyes.

   "Whatever the reason is, I'll take your word for it. I won't even tell anyone else. It'll stay between us. I promise." He was being sincere and he wasn't even mad anymore. I looked back at him still hesitating to tell him.

   "Y-... You promise not to think I'm insane or a threat? And to not tell another soul about this?" I felt like crying as I really didn't want to tell the truth but I wasn't being given any other choice.

   "Why would I think you're a threat?" Jacob asked confused with a brow raised at me.

   "Do you promise or not?!" I lost my temper a bit as I needed his word that he wouldn't tell anyone or see me as dangerous. He jumped back slightly from me snapping at him, but he never let go of my shoulders.

   "I swear on my life that I won't tell another soul or think you're a threat or insane." He said. I gulped so hard it hurt my throat before I let the cat out of the bag.

   "I.... I-I used to live with a pack of hunters... They helped me survive the first six months of the infection... I was part of their pack... I wandered off from them while we were looking for food for me... That's when I fell in the lake and nearly drowned before Chester saved me..."