We Were Free

Chapter 55

"Blaire, open the door." Jake said as he knocked on the outside of the guest bedroom door and he tugged on the handle. I wasn't even saying anything, my phone was died so after he texted and called me over fifty times, it was finally no longer bothering me. It was just him at that point.

"Blaire, I can break this god damn door." He said and I didn't say anything. I was just going to go into the bathroom and shut the door if he did. And if he broke down my door he was getting kicked out of my house, let alone two doors.

"Blaire!" He yelled.

"Jake, leave me the fuck alone!" I screamed.

"Let me in the room!" He yelled and I got up. I unlocked the door and flung it open and he looked down at me.

"What?!" I yelled.

"Just let me talk to you about what happened and explain." He said.

"I literally don't give a shit about what you do anymore. Just leave me alone and don't talk to me. Don't text me, don't call me-you're a psychopath. You're so manipulative and disgusting it's unbelievable. How many times have you really cheated on me? You never told me it was from your brother!" I yelled and I shoved his chest. He grabbed my wrists lightly and pulled them down and I as literally screaming at him. I hated him and I meant it. I genuinely didn't want him anywhere near me.

"Leave!" I screamed.

"Blaire, I'm sorry!" He yelled.

"No! You don't get to just come into my life and act completely normal and sweet and then ruin it! If we weren't together, none of this would have happened. But you tricked me into this relationship and you promised me we'd never interfere with work but here we are. We're both done and resigned and I'm stuck with you being a drug addict and absolutely in love with you, but I can't keep putting myself through this and even your sister is on my side!" I yelled and his eyes softened.

"How do you think I feel?" He asked and I shook my head.

"No. You don't get to guilt me." I said.

"I'm not guilting you-I'm felling you that I have a beautiful fiancé standing in front of me with all the money in the world and yet I still want to do drugs until I'm fucking dead." He said and I felt tears start to swell in my eyes.

"Why do you do it?" I asked.

"I like how it makes me feel and I want to die. So, it's a perfect combination." He said.

"There's no reason for you want to fucking die. It's so fucking selfish of you to even say that." I said.

"Because I don't care about anything but myself, but I do care about you-"

"If you cared about me you wouldn't keep doing this. I just watched you fucking die. You were dead and died in my arms." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes at me. They had to bring you back. If they didn't get here in time, you wouldn't be here." I said and I hit his chest.

"Maybe if I wasn't here you wouldn't have to deal with this." He said.

"Maybe I wouldn't, but I need you here. I need to know you're okay and that you're alive. I can't keep seeing you do this to yourself and I don't know how to even control you anymore. I feel like your mom more than your 'beautiful fiancé'" I said and mocked him and he ran his fingers through his hair.

"I'm sorry." He said.

"Sorry doesn't help at this point." I said.

"So we're done?" He asked.

"I just can't do it anymore. I truly can't keep putting myself in this position." I said.

"Okay." He said and he looked like he was going to cry.

"So please just leave." I said.

"Can I get some type of closure?" He asked.

"You literally just died and you want sex?" I asked.

"I'm fine." He said.

"Please. Leave." I warned.

"I'll always love you, Blaire." He said and I looked away from him.

"I need you to leave." I repeated and he pulled me into him. He held me tightly and I wrapped my arms around him tightly. I buried my face into his neck and he rubbed my back in circles.

"I'm sorry for everything I've done to you and put you through. You are amazing and I mean that with everything in me. You deserve the world and I'm sorry I never gave that to you." He said and I didn't say anything. I just closed my eyes against his neck and I ran my fingers through his hair before letting go. He kissed me softly and I nodded.

"Okay, Jake." I said in an annoyed tone and I pushed him away a little. I just wanted him to get away from me. I couldn't take it anymore. If he stayed I would have ended up in bed with him and I didn't want to.

"Can we still talk?" He asked.

"I need time to even talk to you." I said and he nodded slowly.

"Okay." He said.

"I hope you get the help you deserve."