this is another sad one:,(
I love this song so much so here's to sad girly hours:((
this is a little sad so ‼️ warning ‼️ if this kind of stuff is triggering to you.
you, of course, do not have to read if you don't want to !(or I can make an alternative ending for y'all😽🤫)
anyways, always remember you can talk to me or dm me about anything, bbys !<33 love you !!<3
12/8/19
word count: 954 words
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finn's pov:
I woke up to the smell of coffee.
I saw that y/n was no longer laying next to me in bed, so I instantly knew it was her.
y/n always made coffee in the winter.
she says it helps me stay awake for my work since it gets hot inside now that's it winter.
I like staying in here.
it's warm.
y/n and I just so happen to share a dorm-room so I see her every morning.
i'm glad I do.
she's the only reason i'm ever happy.
it's hard to be happy nowadays.
I walked into the kitchen(idk if they kitchen's in dorms but maybe just a counter space? ok.)
I saw y/n cooking breakfast. my favorite to be exact: pancakes and bacon.
once she sat the plates down next to her on the counter; I snuck up behind her, hugging her from behind and making her jump a little.
she around and held my face in her hands,
"I made you breakfast, love."
"thank you." I whispered, y/n pecking my nose, then my lips.
"sit." y/n brought me to the table, her walking back to the counter and getting my breakfast.
I felt bad because I wasn't hungry, but I didn't want y/n to feel like I didn't appreciate her.
I mean, she made me my favorite breakfast.
she cares for me way too much for me to deny it.
soon, y/n had made plates and coffee for the both of us, resulting us to sit across from each other and eating our breakfast.
"honey, you've barely touched your food. do you feel okay?" y/n asked, concerned.
"oh, i'm good. I ate some of my bacon. i'm just a little slow this morning. ya know, I just didn't have an appetite this morning." I tried to play it off like nothing was wrong.
"baby, you're not okay. I can tell. you can talk to me about anything. you know that, right?"
"of course. i'm just still tired, that's all." I said.
"well maybe, we can go out today. have some fun at the mall or go window shop at target. you love target." y/n smiled, trying to cheer me up.
"yeah. of course, love." I smiled through it.
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"finn, love, you've been sleeping all day. you don't want to go shop some where?" y/n asked, walking into our room.
I turned myself around, now facing y/n.
"I like it here. why don't you come lay with me? you made me breakfast this morning. the least I could do is cuddle you."
"finn, please? for me? I promise, you won't regret it ! it'll be so fun !" y/n smiled, trying to convince me to go.
I was silent for a few seconds until I answered,
"I guess, only because I love you." I spoke, making y/n ecstatic.
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we were at the mall for a couple hours. it was fun, but overwhelming.
I didn't like being around a lot of people.
once we got home, I went straight to bed.
so did y/n.
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I was woken up by y/n shaking me awake.
"finn, it's snowing outside !" she was so excited and I felt so bad because I didn't feel like doing anything today.
I felt stuck in a time loop where everyday just repeats over and over.
school, homework, sleep.
y/n makes it better though.
I love her and I am so grateful that she loves me.
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once we finished getting ready and putting on all of our winter clothes, we walked outside, y/n instantly trying to build a snowman.
it was cold, and the wind was blowing so that didn't make it much better.
"finn, come on ! help me make his head. we have to make this perfect." I looked at her, slowly walking over and gathering snow in my hands. thank god I had gloves.
"come on, finn. cheer up ! it's better being out here than inside. it's just boring inside." I smiled and began helping her.
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your pov:
"that was the best day of my life. not because it was our last moment together but because you were genuinely happy. you smiled, you laughed. I didn't want to see you go, but at least you were happy that day. at least you left with happy memories." I was kneeled on the ground talking to him. I know he's not with me anymore, but sometimes it feels like he is.
sometimes, it feels like he's listening. I hope he's happy up there, but i'm alone now.
finn was such a bright person, I never thought he would ever do something like this.
finn left me and his friends, family that day. he had been dealing with depression and anxiety for a long time.
I wanted to help him but I didn't know how. I knew finn went to therapy for it but I never thought he would end his own life. I never knew it was this bad, but now I wish I did.
maybe I could've saved him.
(please let me know if you bbys want an alternative ending. I know that this is a sad note to end on:(()
