I'm Not Supposed To Like You

O N E

TRIGGER WARNING AHEAD! This story contains some pretty heavy topics like self harm, depression, suicide atempt(s) and verbal/physical abuse. I will put triggers ahead but if you are easily triggered by any of these topics, please, for your safety, stop reading now.

Shigaraki's P.O.V

   I don't know how I managed to get into UA but I had mixed feeling about the whole thing. I managed to pass the entrance exams decaying the robots and gaining points quickly. There were so many people, all with different and impressive quirks that could be so much better than mine. Maybe not so much like a villains quirk. I've been told by multiple people that maybe I just wasn't fit to be a hero and that maybe a villain would work better with my quirk. However, the kids here were all pretty accepting about the whole thing. They didn't call me a villain like other people in my old school did. They were all happily accepting at first. Once they were accepting, I had a few friends and we were all kind of close and I came out to them. They were shocked at first and then just overall ignored my presence like I wasn't there. Well, most people ignored me. Except for one stupid boy who made fun of me. 

   Mine and Dabi's relationship was strange. He knew I was gay and would make fun of me for it but also sat with me at lunch sometimes and helped me train. I don't know why Mister Staples liked to hang around me. I really didn't get friendship vibes from myself though I wouldn't even call us friends. We were like rivals, I think. This was where I got confused. Were we friends or not? Were we close or just classmates? Did he like me back? Well, that last question I would never know but the answer was almost positively no. I mean, he made fun of me all the time for being gay. 

   Grabbing my books with my pinkies up, trying not to dissolve the books as I put them in my bag. Closing the zipper I fling the black backpack on my back, about to head to class when the loud slamming of my locker door startled me. Grabbing my bag tight, one of the straps of the bag dissolved. And who was the boy behind my locker door? Dabi. "Hey asshole, could you not do that every day?" I asked, walking by him to get to class. "I do it everyday. You think you would be used to it by now." He said, a stupid smirk on his face. "Well, news flash, I'm startled easily. You know this." I said, making my way through the long hallway. I was never late to class because nobody wanted to stand in the gay boy's way. Dabi would go outside and smoke before coming to class resulting in him being late. 

   "I'm going to class. Go smoke or do your thing." I said, making my way to the door.  "Okay mister gay." He said with a laugh catching the attention from a few other students laughing at his comment. God why did it have to him? Why? Sitting in class, the chairs slowly start filling up with students. The teacher started teaching like normal. Today we would be practicing our quirks on each other with partners with combat battles. Grabbing two small boxes, he passed out colored strands of fabric, one blue to other color red. The point was to get with a partner with the opposite color headband and use your quirk to the best of your abilities to get the others headband first. Grabbing the blue headband from my desk, I tie it on carefully, looking around the room trying to see the other colors people had got. And just my luck, Dabi got a red headband. We always made fun of each other's quirks even though we both knew they were strong quirks to have so we always battled each other any chance we got.

   "Now go change to your hero costumes and meet at the battle grounds outside." All filing out of class, we head to the locker rooms changing into our hero costumes. Mine was pretty simple, a black long sleeve shirt and black pants and red shoes. The interesting part of it were the hands. I thought they were cool considering my quirk. There was a hand covering my face and back of my head, two wrapping around my neck and a few wrapped around my arms and two at my sides. Dabi called me 'handy man' because of it but his hero costume couldn't be any better. It was bland but suited him well; a white shirt, black pants, and a long leather coat with silver detailing on the sleeves. After changing we made it to the battle grounds outside. Dabi and I instantly paired up like usual and distance ourselves from the other groups. 

   With the blow of a whistle, the fighting began with students battling and fighting each other. My quirk was one that had to be used for direct contact while Dabi's could easily be used a few feet away which put me at a disadvantage. Running forward, the blue flames ingulfed his arms stopping me from getting any closer. "Aw, are you scared?" He mocked standing still in his spot. With out a second thought, I was behind him and before he had time to process it, my hand was in his shoulder, one pinkie in the air. "Oh, I'm frightened." I mocked back, pushing him down on the ground. He fell back and tumbled picking himself up the flames stronger and heating up my face. Running towards him, the flames hit my face and burned a little but before he could keep them out longer he fell over and I crawled on top of him. Pressing my hand to his face, I smile at his terrified face. "One wrong move and your face is gone." I smiled but before I could grab his headband, mine was snatched from my head and rested in his hand, pushing me off of him and standing, taking off his own. 

   "Well that was a fun battle wouldn't you say Shiggy?" He asked, walking to the teacher to hand him our headbands. "You little bitch." I mumbled as he walked back towards me. "You're the one who lost. One for me. Zero for gay boy." He said, walking back inside with the other students who had finished their battles. Standing up, I brush the dust off my jeans and head back to the locker rooms to change back into my uniform. "Hey." I heard, looking around to an already dressed Dabi. "Meet me outside after you change." Nodding, I was still upset about our battle. He totally cheated. 

   After changing, I waited by the gates of the school. Students made their way home laughing and talking in groups and I felt left out. I wish it wasn't like this. The only 'friend' I have likes to tease me until I'm angry. Speaking of which, he was making his way towards me. Looking around, nobody else is around before he pulls me to the side. "Look loser. I'm not sure what these feelings are but they only happen around you. So, I think I love you but I'm not sure." He stopped to look at the ground. Oh. Out of all people, why him? And why after hoping this would happen, sounds like it was wrong? "I- I like you too..." I wasn't sure what to do. Grabbing my blazer, he pulls me into a rough kiss. I wasn't sure what to do. "We're dating now. But if you tell anyone about this, you're dead." He stated, letting go of my jacket as I stumble back a little. 

Why can't I tell anyone? 

And what extent would he go to keep this a secret?