To Take Away Your Pain ✓

3. Wish I could hear the real version of it.

“Abhi mujhme kahin, baaki todhi si hai zindagi
Jagi dhadkan nayi, Jaana zinda hun main toh abhi
Kuch aisi lagan, iss lamhen me hai
Ye lamha kahaan tha mera?”
- Abhi Mujhme Kahin

(I still have a little life left in me somewhere
A new heart beat awoke, making me realize I'm still alive
Such a resolve is what this moment holds
Where had this moment of mine been?)

_________________________________________

“I…” love you too. Just say it. But it feels like I'm totally playing him. Dammit. My emotions are everywhere. Why can’t I just professionally handle this?

“Chase, you are okay now, right?” I changed the topic. This question wouldn’t bring happiness but, it had to be done soon anyway.

“I…Ah. Baby, I… I'm on wheelchair?” He doubted his own sentence, not knowing how to explain this but he still continued, “Doctors aren’t sure when or whether I-I’ll be able to, walk again.” 

“Chase, forget what the doctors say, okay? I know you can walk again. You just have to try… And I'm so sorry I'm not there to help you.” I made her voice sound like that of pleading when I said the last part. Wish I could hear the real version of it.

“I will, baby. I will try my best, I promise. You don’t have to worry, love. Ray is with me. You just relax, okay? I just want to meet you, see you, that’s all. Except for that, I’ll handle everything. You concentrate on your job. I know how much you wanted it… Don’t worry about me.” Just how sweet can this man be? Is he for real?

“You’re the sweetest, Chase… I need to go now but I’ll talk to you later, okay? Take care.”

“Oh. Ya. Of course. Take care, baby.”

I ended the call and let out a breath I had unknowingly been holding. Ray’s face fell in his palms in relief while me and Clara were just happy that it went fine.

Ray’s mobile ringed, just when he was about to say something. He grinned when he looked at the caller id and we instantly knew who it was. He put it on speaker too.
“Hey, bro.”

“Ray! She called! Tina called.” I had a stupid grin on my face. If only someone loved me this much. If only.

“Uhm-hmm.” Ray was trying not to laugh but I knew it wasn’t a taunting one, it was a relieved one. He was happy to see his brother so joyful. He had told me how Chase had become silent and gloomy over the days.

I think I'm over my slight guilt now. If me doing something could make someone with such a warm heart so happy, it’s surely worth it.

“Not uhm-hmm, you idiot. She called… Wait, you are with Clara, aren’t you? Are you even listening to what I'm saying?” I covered my mouth with my hand, to suppress my laughter at what Chase was implying. My shoulders were shaking and Clara was glaring at me, which only made me want to laugh harder.

“Chase.”, he warned, “I am. Listening to you. Shut the hell up.”

“Why are acting like I announced it to everyone?... She heard me?! Why do you keep your mobile volume so high? Sorry Clara.”

“Chase, Shut. Up.” Even though he was embarrassed, his eyes were glowing gleefully to have his brother back.

I don’t think I’ve done a better deed. Yep. Its official. This one is an achievement of mine. I admired the conversation playfully as I sat, folding my legs Indian style, rested my elbow on my thigh and my chin on my palm as the siblings continued to argue foolishly. I think it was their way of conveying and confirming that everything was back to normal now.
Okay. Not everything but at least, some things.

Clara just walked out, shaking her head, mostly to get some snacks. She is such a foodie. I decided to give them their space and walked out too. It was getting dark.

I should start making dinner.

“Hey, you guys staying for dinner?”, I asked Clara, who had made herself home, sitting on the hand rest of my Sofa, holding the remote, changing channels in the television.

“Sure”, she mumbled with a mouth full of chips. I shook my head as I planned to make Chicken curry and rice. Clara’s favorite.

When it was halfway complete, Clara came running in.
“I love you, babe”, she said, obviously sensing what I'm preparing.

“I know. I know. Who’s the best?”

“You are.”, she melted as she hugged me, making me chuckle.

“Woah! Smells good”, arrived Ray.

I just smiled in response as I asked Clara to set the table. It had been long since I had had a guest at home. Of course, if I don’t include Clara. It felt good to not chew my food boringly in silence but be interrupted by Clara’s chirpy voice, Ray’s sometimes polite words directed to me, otherwise witty insults and flirtatious comments, both directed towards his girlfriend. It was fun and I was happy. Sometimes, it’s just really sad that these simply things can make me so happy. Makes me wonder just how meaningless my life, otherwise, is.

“Thank you so much for everything, Diana”, Ray said, just as we finished dinner.

“It’s okay. I hope everything goes well and also, that when the truth comes out, I don’t end up being hated.” They chuckled but we all knew that we all feared the same, but we chose to let that slide.