As much as I want to

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I stood there frozen, refusing to believe that Niall just said that. I fight the urge to cry and just stormed out the comfort room to confront him.

But when I reached our table, he was gone, and so is his bimbo.

I said goodbye to Ashton and Gemma, using a stomachache as an excuse. Thankfully they bought it. They insisted to take me home but I declined, I do not want to cry in front of them, that will just spike up their curiosity , which I really don’t need right now.

I sat on the back of the cab and my brain keeps on repeating what Niall has said to me, I thought about not going back to his place and just renting a hotel room but I still ended up in front of his door.

My hands were shaking as I reach for the doorknob.

What if they are here? What if I walked up to them in the middle of something?

But to my relief, his flat is dark and empty.

I quickly changed to one of Niall’s shirt and prepared to sleep. I jumped when I heard the door slammed, then followed by a series of slurred curses.

He’s drunk.

“There you are!” He smirked as he entered the bedroom, flicking on the lights that is partially blinding me.

“What are you doing here?” I stupidly asked.

“This is my house.” He answered sarcastically, as I expected.

“Where’s your bimbo?” I spat.

Instead of answering my question, he walked over to me, pushed me into the bed and started to kiss me roughly.

I like it rough but this doesn’t count.

“Niall! Stop!” I demanded.

He kept going.

His hands went to down to my thigh and struggled to go under my shorts.

I gathered my strength and pushed him off me, causing him to fall beside me.

“How many times are you going to deny me today?” he plopped his hands down his sides.

“As much as I want to.”

“Well, I should have fucked her then.” He yelled, his face red, angry.

I slammed the door leaving him there and slept at the couch.

I awoke to the clattering sounds from the kitchen, Niall was in his boxers and he’s wearing an apron.

He was cooking.

He gave me a sweet smile as he prepared the table. “Good morning, Muffin. Breakfast will be ready in a few.”

I ignored him, still mad at him for what happened last night and walked back to the bedroom without acknowledging him.

I felt the mattress shift and Niall gently pulled me so I was facing him.

‘’Muff.” He said softly.

He pulled my face towards him and he started kissing me, my lips, my jawline towards my neck, and not long after that he was already hovering over me.

Before I realize what is happening, my clothes are already on the floor, he’s hips are in between my thighs and he’s slowly easing himself inside me.

I wasn’t really in the mood for sex, but I also wasn’t in the mood to argue with him either.

He began to move, gently like he’s afraid he might break me.

“Muffin, look at me please.” He turned my face so I was facing him again. “I’m sorry.”

I closed my eyes, fighting the moans that are building in my throat. Yes, I’m still mad but his gentle thrusts are doing certain things to my body. I wanted to pull him closer to me, beg him to go faster but I didn’t.

I am mad at him. The words he said last night still stung.

And just like that, my mind flashed back to the moment he called me a slut.

His hands intertwining with mine brought me back, and before I knew it he stiffened and groaned into my ear.

He came, and I didn’t.

He pulled out and collapsed next to me, I turned my back against him, so he won’t see the tears coming.

I officially feel like a slut right now.

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