Die In Your Arms

Chapter 7 - The Truth

Alexa's POV:

I woke up that next morning, wondering if Jessie was my friend. I didn't want to go to school, I wanted to lay here all day. I wanted to sit by Emily's bed side, telling her, "It's okay." 

But I can't. I had to drag myself out of the bed. I walked unsteadily down the hall to Emily's room. She lay there, motionless. Her skin was transparent, her veins stuck out. Her eyes squeezed shut, her breathing short. It was so quiet you could hear our blood flowing throughout our bodies. I sat beside her bedside, slowly taking hold of her hand. "Emily, you awake?" I asked. She put on a weak smile and nodded slowly. "I've got to go to school again today, I love you." I kissed her head and let go of her hand, looking back before I left. That should be me, I thought. She's a tiny fragile kid, I was almost an adult. I rummaged through my closet, pulling out a plain baby blue sweatshirt. Underneath I had a tanktop with the words "you are beautiful" in the center in a handwritten font. I slipped on skinny jeans, grabbed my old sneakers along with a beanie. I stuck out the outgrowing strands of hair and sighed. I put on natural eye shadow, along with eyeliner and mascara.

I plop in my seat and grab a blue pen, drawing an infinity sign on my ring finger. I liked how I had drew it, it looked perfect. Jessie sat beside me, pulling out her papers from homework last night. "I didn't get that-" "She doesn't have to give it to you, you live in the cancer hospital and she said you're dismissed from homework." "Oh-"  

I was now...special? 

I'm not a good kind of special, just a cancer special. "You have to show me how to do that!" Jessie sang, pointing to my eyeliner. "What, the curled tip?" She nodded. "I can't ever made them, they always end up all messed up." I looked down at my pretty nails Jessie had fixed for me yesterday.

Jessie had a red streak in her hair I had fixed for her that almost blended into her natural hair color. "Do you ever get...lonely?" she startled me. I nodded, because honestly I did. She sat there for a while. "Do you have any siblings?" she asked. "I used to have one." She sat up straighter, wanting more. "On December 27 she'll be 24, well she would be. Her name was Johanna. She was a cunning girl. One night she went out with her boyfriend who she had gotten engaged with that month before. They were driving and they got hit by a person who was texting and driving. They both died later in the hospital. I had come along because I had no one to keep me. I walked into her room, 214. She lay there, didn't speak to anyone. Didn't know who she was or where she was. She was paralyzed. She stayed like that but we refused to leave. 04:37 AM she stopped breathing. Her heart stopped beating. She died."  

Jessie hugged me as I wiped away a tear. I wept silently and did not speak, my voice was not stable. I could not listen to the lesson, my mind wondered to memories of Johanna. Her red hair fell to her shoulders with bangs so long you wouldn't think they were bangs. Her green eyes twinkled in the light. Her lips, so vibrant pink you thought she had lipstick on.  

I thought back to grabbing onto her hand screaming, "No! Please! Please!" I remember throwing a fit before we had to leave. I remember the sobs, the deadly silence, the smell of her perfume, her smile, her voice. I lay my head down and wept as years dripped off my nose onto the desk. I soaked my desk with tears. I wiped my eyes on my sleeve and sniffed, having hiccup sensations because of aftershock after a hard cry. Mascara was running down my cheeks and Jessie asked the teacher if we could go to the bathroom.

I ran up to the mirror and wiped my face with tissues, pulling my mascara out of my purse. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring it up-" "No it's okay. I cry a lot anyway." She looked at me blankly. "Don't blame yourself for everything." I just stood there in silence, finishing my mascara and popping it back into my purse. I walked out and slipped back in my seat, praying no one saw me crying. I had one more hiccup and then stopped.

I wanted to escape this pain, this sadness. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs. I wanted this to be a dream so I could wake up as a newborn baby, no cancer, real family. I stuffed my head in my sleeves and squeezed my eyes shut.

Emily's POV:

My eyes so weak they stay closed, my ears wide open. The pain of different IV's stuck up my arm. I felt like I could just fall into my death. I felt like if I fell asleep I'd die without Alexa here. I struggled to stay awake and stay alive, but I'm trying. I'm trying so hard

for Alexa.

Alexa's POV:

I shuffled to 5th period and plopped down somewhere. Hair slapped in my face and I realized who's blonde hair it was. It was Alana, the 'queen' of this school. She smirked at me and turned to the board. Alana's posse crowded around her, telling her, "OMG GURL! I'm sorry for your loss." I was confused, then I heard sobs. Alana's head was down as I stood up and got a bathroom pass. I walked through the hallway and walked into the bathroom, locking myself in the stall. I heard the 'clank' of heals stroll down the hall into the bathroom. I put my feet up on the toilet seat, it was Alana. She wandered in her purse, grabbing a...pocket knife? She was sobbing and fell to her knees, I squinted under the stall to see. She stuffed her mouth in her sleeve and slit her wrist. I studied it, it had many scars following it. How hadn't I noticed? She released her sleeve from her mouth, tears running down her cheek, and she smiled weakly...as if it were forced. She hopped up to the sink, running -- warm -- water on her wrist. She got a tissue that was crumpled up in her purse, wiping up the blood. She pulled her sleeve down and re-applied her makeup. She checked under the stalls twice, nodding and leaving. I made sure she was gone and unlocked my stall. I slowly walked back into class and slipped in my seat. I wanted to ask her a million questions, but I couldn't now.

*Lunch*

I couldn't believe what I was doing, I had told Jessie everything and she was shocked, I slowly walked over toward the populars. Everyone was gone but Alana. "Can I tell you something I saw?" I asked. She rolled her eyes. "Whatevarr." "Do you...self harm?" She laughed weakly but turned serious. "How do you know?" "I was in a stall and I saw everything. I self-harm, too." I showed her my wrist in proof, 3 fresh cuts on both my arms. She showed me hers, 2 on both arms along with old painful scars. "His favorite number was four, he never said why." she mumbled. "Who?" "My dad. He passed yesterday. He was the only one I had left." "..what happened?" She inhaled deeply and sighed. "My mom died from breast cancer when I was 4, my dad was so depressed I had to stay with my grandparents because he said I resembled to her so much. I didn't see him a lot for the next 3 years. Finally, I got to be back with him. He always stared off into space. Never spoke a lot. He slipped right back into depression." she wiped a tear quickly. "You don't have to continue," I said. "My mom and dad died in a car wreck when I was 11. They say a drunk driver hit them, but I know the truth. They all think it was a car wreck, but I know better."

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Hehe cliff hangerrr! 

Do you guys like it so farr? 

Thanks for readinggg!(: 

-Angel x