𝑨𝑵 (𝑰𝑴)𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑭𝑬𝑪𝑻 𝑫𝑰𝑺𝑨𝑺𝑻𝑬𝑹 || 𝑃𝑎𝑟𝑘 𝑆𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑔ℎ𝑤𝑎✔

Chapter 4

When I go back downstairs, I hear all the voices of the guests coming from the dining room.

I wipe away my tears, hoping they won't notice that I've cried, and I go to my destiny, although I would like to shut myself up in my room and scream against the pillow.

The thirty people, of whom I don't even know the half, don't even seem to notice my entrance, too intent on eating the appetizers that my mother has prepared since yesterday.

As soon as I sit down Seonghwa also enters.

"Come on dear, sit here"
My mother points to Seonghwa the place next to mine.

I see that he is looking for my gaze, as if to ask me for approval, but I immediately lower it.

How much I wish I could become invisible-

"I hope you like what we cooked"
My mother focuses her attention on Seonghwa, who sits next to me.

"I'm sure of it, and certainly better than campus canteen food-"
"What?! Are you staying on campus? Are you spending your holidays there?"
My mother should be an actress, she can be so melodramatic.

"Yes, I don't know anyone here and-"
"I can't even hear such a thing. Tomorrow you move here until classes start again"

"What?!"
It leaves my mouth in a higher tone than i intended, thus turning all the guests towards me.

"You don't want Seonghwa to spend the holidays alone, right dear?"
The look my mother gives me immediately makes me shut up again, I know I can't win.

"No, I assure you that-"
Seonghwa tries to say, but is immediately interrupted by my mother who reminds him that his father is the boss of mine and that he is practically like one of the family, like a brother to me and blah blah..
I just wanna leave.

I have stopped listening since I realized that not only I'll find Seonghwa on campus, but now also at home for an endless week.

How can I forget about him like this..

I am playing with mashed potatoes on my plate when I feel a hand hold mine under the table.

I turn to look at the owner of that hand, but Seonghwa acts with indifference by continuing to listen to my mother.

The head tells me to tear my hand from his grip immediately, but my heart has been waiting for this contact for years..

And here it is again, the confusion.

Pretend to accept his affection or try to get away from him?

Whatever my choice is, I always seem to be destined to suffer.

Damn Park Seonghwa, you and what you make me feel.