Remember Me

2020. 12. 17

Red flowers.

Eddy still remembered their first date, vivid as if it was just yesterday.

"Aren't you cheesy," Brett smiled widely when Eddy shyly gave him a bouquet of red roses.

"I will take that away now, thank you," Eddy playfully tried to take back the roses. Brett giggled, hugging the flowers tighter in defense.

"I was joking...! I love them. Thank you, Eddy. They are beautiful."

Brett sniffed the fresh roses in his arms, relishing in their sweet scents. Brett's face was flushed pink, surrounded by ruby petals that made a stunning contrast with his pale face.

Oh god, Brett is so beautiful. Too beautiful for it to be real.

Is that why God is taking him away from me?

***

Brett was crying.

Eddy woke up from the armchair, startled to find Brett crouched down next to the bed, sniffling. It took a moment to take in the whole situation: Brett's wet sweatpants and a smell of urine.

"Oh Bretty," Eddy gingerly scooped up Brett in his arms.

"I couldn't find the restroom," Brett whispered, his voice tinged with fear.

"Yes, that happens to me sometimes too. It's alright," Eddy's voice was calm as he placed Brett inside the tub. He stripped off Brett from his soiled clothes and turned on the shower.

"Is the temperature alright?"

Brett nodded. Brett sat still, enjoying the feeling of warm water running from his hair and to his body. Eddy's hands softly traced Brett's hair and body with soaps, making sure all the curves of his body were cleaned. Eddy touched Brett's protruding ribs and could feel how thin Brett has gotten since his diagnosis. No matter how hard he was trying, it just never seemed to be enough to keep Brett...as Brett, healthy and happy, as the person he loved so much and still loves.

"It was like this," Brett broke the silence, drawing a simple flower on the glass wall covered with steam.

"The red flowers?"

"Mm-Hmm."

Eddy smiled as he turned off the shower.

"Let's take a quick walk to the flower shop before breakfast. How about that?"

Eddy dried off Brett with a towel and put Brett on his fresh clothes. Like this, Brett almost looked normal. His cheek flushed red from the warmth and the smell of familiar shampoo and clean clothes. Until...

"Where are we going?" Brett asked while Eddy helped him put on his shoes.

"We're taking a walk. To the flower shop," Eddy replied, not missing a beat.

"Oh yes, flowers," Brett muttered.

They walked outside, hand in hand. It was a beautiful day, perfect for a small morning walk. Eddy led them to an uncrowded street beside their house. He could feel Brett tense up beside him from the unfamiliarity, although he has walked this street countless times. Eddy firmly grabbed Brett's hand for reassurance.

A few minutes later, they reached a small flower shop at the end of the street. Eddy immediately bought some red roses that were made into a small bouquet.

"Here," Eddy smiled, handing the flowers to Brett. Eddy wished to see a beam of excitement from Brett once again, just like their first date.

Brett took the bouquet with uncertainty. He sniffed the roses and carefully felt the petals with his fingers as if he was not sure what to make of them. Then, Brett's eyes suddenly turned fierce.

"This is not- this is not what I-!"

Brett failed to finish his sentence as he struck the bouquet forcefully to Eddy. Petals flew to the air, red. The flower lady gasped behind them.

"No, Brett. Stop!" Eddy tried to hold Brett's wrists firmly. Brett resisted furiously as he kept smacking Eddy with roses. The violence continued until there were only a few petals hanging from each stem, the rest fluttering to the ground.

"You're wrong! You're wrong!!"

Eddy hugged Brett, feeling the small body trembling inside him.

"Yes, I was wrong. I'm sorry, Brett. I'm so sorry," Eddy choked out the words, trying not to cry. Brett is sick. Brett is just sick. No reason to cry from this, no.

Brett began to calm down after Eddy's apology. The bouquet fell to the ground with a soft thud. The rose petals were all over and around them, staining the road crimson.

"...where am I?" Brett asked in a small voice.

"We're going home, Brett. You're safe," Eddy whispered, hugging Brett tighter in his arms. 

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-eykim28