Friends - HyungKyun

4-Changkyun

"Well, Changkyun, if we are going to be living together we may as well get to know each other. 20 questions?" Hyungwon proposed. I hated that game. You never know what kind of question the other will ask. Some things I just really don't want others to know.

"Could we play something else?" I asked hesitantly.

"What if we make it only five questions each?" That didn't sound much better, but Hyungwon didn't seem to budge from the questions game.

"Fine. I'll start then, I guess," another reason I don't like this game, I suck at thinking of questions. "When is your birthday?"

"January 15th. My turn. Do you like men?" This was it. I knew he'd ask questions I didn't want to answer. I couldn't see any way around answering him. What if he wants to change roommates because I'm gay? Then again, we just met. Would it be that bad? What if he's popular- 

"Are you going to answer me?" Hyungwon interrupted my thoughts. He leaned forward to look at my face from across the room. The way the lamp on the desk shadowed his features made him look kind of angelic. I couldn't help but stare until he moved back to his original position against the wall. "I didn't think my questions were that ba-"

"Yes. I'm gay." I answered quickly. Too quickly for that matter. I had almost yelled it. He looked at me but didn't say anything. Obviously, he was fine with me not being straight.

"It's your turn Changkyun."

"Oh! I'm sorry! Uh, where are you from?"

"Gwangju, South Korea"

"I was born there too! Why'd you come here though?"

"It was the farthest I could get from home," He sounded sad yet there was no change in emotion on his face that was visible from my side of the room. He quickly changed the subject to ask his question, no longer sounding sad, but hesitant. "Since you asked two, I ask two. How long have you known that you were gay and how did your parents react?"

Silence fell over the room as I thought about when I had told my parents. They hadn't cared from what I could tell. "My first boyfriend was four years ago so probably five years now. My parents didn't show any signs of being mad, but they didn't exactly encourage it either." Hyungwon only nodded in response. He had seemed to lose all of the confidence he's had since I first got here. I should be the one without confidence right now. "Um, are y- are you okay?"

Hyungwon looked up from his hands that had found their way to some of the strings on his blanket. There were two glimmering lines going down from his eyes. I hadn't heard any noise come from him to suggest he was crying. 

"Yeah." The older choked out. Without thinking, I got off of my bed and went over to his bed a little hesitantly to ask permission without speaking. When Hyungwon moved over, I crawled up next to him and hugged him. I didn't know why he was crying, but I didn't want him to feel alone. 

"I know we only just met, but you can talk to me about whatever is making you upset." I didn't want to push him either. I just wanted him to know that I could be there for him. I don't know why I decided to be so nice when I had met him on the same day. Hyungwon shook his head and pushed himself lower so he could rest his head on my shoulder.

"Maybe eventually, but not now." He whispered. I nodded knowing he'd feel it even if he couldn't see it. The drastic change in his emotions and actions made me worry, but soon I could feel his body getting heavier as he drifted off. I put my hand under his head so I could hold it as I moved out from under him to get off the bed. Right as I maneuvered myself out, he started talking again. "Hey, Changkyun?"

I moved my hand away as he lifted his head. "Yeah?"

"Please don't change roommates or anything because of this. I swear I'm not always like this. Please don't leave me." He pleaded. I was a little shocked that he thought I would do such a thing over something so small.

"Of course I won't leave. I promise." I looked at him sympathetically not knowing what else to say to that to make him believe me more. 

I turned around to turn off the lamp on the desk and go to bed as it had seemed like Hyungwon was tired. 

"Wait. We haven't finished the questions yet." He said in a low voice.

"Are you sure you still want to play that? It is getting pretty late." I really didn't want to play anymore seeing as it had found a way to make Hyungwon cry. He had shown me a side of him that I don't think he wanted me to see.

"Oh, yeah." Hyungwon looked down playing with more strings and wrapping them around his ring finger. The sad expression on his face was highlighted with the yellowish light beaming on to one side of his face. I had felt guilty for making him seem sad again.

"If you really want to finish, then I guess an extra ten minutes wouldn't hurt." The way his face had lit up was enough to make anyone happy too, but only if you couldn't see the sad look in his eyes. I smiled at him and asked how many questions were left.

"I don't really know anymore. I think we both asked at least two though, so three?" I was just glad he didn't ask to start over, so I nodded to agree and turned towards my bed. "Hey, um, Changkyun?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you mind, um, sitting next to me? It's just really dark and kind of hard to see you over there." Hyungwon was, again, timid. Was he scared of how I'd react? This just made me wonder about his past more.

I smiled and got back on his bed to sit facing him, but he didn't turn towards me. Starring at the other side of the room he asked his first question, "If you're also from Gwangju, then why did you come here?" He finally looked at me as he waited for an answer. His eyes still showing a sign that he had cried not too long ago.

I sighed as I realized how childish it would probably sound to him. "My friend, Hoseok, the buff brown-haired guy that was here earlier, has wanted to come here for a long time and since he, Kiyhun, who was also here earlier, and I have a similar goal we agreed to all apply here so we could stay together. I've lost one best friend, that was enough. Sorry." I realized I had said too much and he noticed that I felt uncomfortable with it.

"That's okay. I won't ask about that if you don't want me too. I know what it's like. You should bring Hoseok and Kihyun over though, they seemed cool." I was relieved that he wouldn't ask about it but was surprised that he actually wanted my friends here.

"I'm sure they'd love to come. Um, my turn." I knew what I wanted to ask, but was afraid to ask in case he reacted badly. I tried to look like I was thinking about my question while I gathered the courage to ask. "Um, ar-are you, by any chance, gay? Or bisexual, there's that too or anything else. Sorry, you don't have to answer that." I looked at my hands that were now fidgeting with the stings on his blanket too. I didn't dare look up at him until I heard him chuckle.

"Yeah. I'm gay. Are you always this nervous?" He said with a smile as the light shined directly on to his face. Showing every perfectly shaped line. His lips were large but in a good way. And his hair fell in a way that perfectly complimented his face.

"Says you." I know that sounded like an answer from a ten-year-old, but it was all I could think to say. He only continued to smile as he turned his gaze back to the opposite wall.

"Maybe we should just go to sleep. It's almost ten." I could tell that there was more to what he said, but I let it go. I hesitated before agreeing with him and moving to get off of his bed yet again. I turned off the lamp and got into bed not even checking my phone. "Hey, Changkyun-" I turned over to look at his direction in the darkness. All I could see was a slim outline of where he was.

"Yeah?" I asked waiting for him to continue.

"Um- goodnight." I heard him turn over in his bed, probably towards the wall. That wasn't all he had originally wanted to say, but I wasn't going to ask about what he obviously didn't want to say now.

"Goodnight, Hyungwon."