October 29
I was just two restless, excited nights away from the big Halloween party. Maybe I'd meet my soulmate. Maybe my life would change. I totally wasn't freaking out. Not at all. Just another day in- OMG, what is wrong with me?
I, unfortunately, had to get myself out of bed. There was a long day on my path. A long day of waiting. Being a Thursday, I had to work. So work I did.
At the time, I was working part-time at the local theatre. It was an alright job, but you can guess that cleaning backstage and helping amateur actors switch their costumes wasn't really my life goal. It wasn't long before I would get my big gig, though. I'd reach the real stage soon enough, I would have bet anything on it. It was my calling, after all. That was why I never even told anyone where I was working. I didn't want to be the one who made his way up, I wanted everyone to open their eyes one day and see me up there. Maybe they'd believe I'd been there all along.
Oh, tangent. I had been doing that so much lately.
-----
It was only four when he and I met at the park. He was lost in thought when I arrived, leaning way back with his legs stretched out in front of him. His eyes stayed trained on the blue sky, even when I placed myself beside him. "You're wearing my sweater," I noted aloud. He glanced at me and then stared up again.
"I was returning it," he said. "But I got cold."
I smiled at him, even if he couldn't see it. "Just hang on to it." I watched carefully as his face changed. His neutral, maybe even slightly sad expression morphed into this tiny smirk of a smile. He shook his head and sat up slowly. We made our first proper eye contact of the day.
"I was probably going to steal it anyway," he said. His smile was the only evidence of his words being a joke.
"Oh, hush."
"No, really, you saved me time here."
"Okay, that's enough from you," I said, nudging him in the side with my elbow. That was the exact moment I noticed something new. We were sitting closer together than usual. I looked down at our legs to figure out which one of us had moved, and to my surprise, it seemed to be both of us. It was just a couple inches, but still enough to make me notice. I felt a tingly feeling in my stomach. Therefore, it was enough to leave butterflies in my stomach, too.
We sat together until 5:30.
"May I walk you home?" I asked when we stood. His eyes went wide and he looked slightly horrified. "Oh, I don't-"
"No, it's not-"
"No really I-"
"I'm sorry, I just-"
We both paused. After a moment of just staring at each other, a grin spread across my face. "Walk me?" I asked, holding out my arm. He laughed and linked arms with me. I ignored that it wasn't entirely in character for him; It just felt nice to see him comfortable. As we made our way out of the park, I felt the feeling again: butterflies.
----------
"This is me," I announced. Our arms had fallen away from each other long before, but the warmth of the connection was still there. He didn't need to, but he walked me right to my door and stood for a moment. As I unlocked my door, some silence fell. I heard a quiet sigh escape his lips. "Hey," I said. He looked up at me. "Are you... good?"
"I..." He looked away. I hated how quickly he turned anxious.
"You don't need to answer. I just thought I should ask. You've been... worryingly quiet today," I said. I hoped I was coming across as gentle, but when he flinched, I knew I had messed up somewhere. "Not, like, constantly. Other times you were worryingly loud." His eyes slowly met mine. I felt my heart break as we stared at each other. His eyes were turning glossy. "Please don't cry."
"Roman," he whispered. His voice cracked. "Can I- Can you-" He held his arms out, and I understood what he was asking for. I stepped forwards and gently wrapped my arms around his waist, in contrast to him as he desperately flung his arms around my neck. His head rested on my shoulder, where I felt a warm spot form.
"Please don't cry," I mumbled again, hugging him tighter. He sobbed and I rested my head against his.
"I'm not," he choked out.
For a while, I just held him against me. It took a few minutes for him to slow his breathing down, and he let go. When we parted, I placed my hand on his cheek. My thumb ran along just under his left eye, wiping away the remnants of his tears. "Be okay," I said. Without thinking, I pressed my lips to the top of his forehead. I pulled back and stepped away, letting my hand fall to my side. "You should go home. You need to get some sleep, I think."
He looked dazed. His eyes were puffy and shiny from the moment before. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I do. I'll... I'll see you tomorrow, Princey."
Quickly, he hugged me one more time and rushed off. I watched him until he reached the end of the driveway. Then, I turned away and went inside my lonely house. Somehow, I could still feel his arms around me. I pictured him in my sweater, walking home alone, tears in his eyes, and it only served to make me sad.
How could someone so pretty, so wonderful, be so broken?
No, he wasn't broken. Not really. He was having a hard time, sure, but broken means he had to be fixed. He was more like... a puzzle, maybe. Some of the pieces just weren't fitting into place right now. That being said, some puzzles are easier with two people.
I pictured his arms around me again.
His life was not my puzzle to solve, but maybe, just maybe, I was making it a little easier for him. That was enough for me for now.
YOU ARE READING
Park Bench (Prinxiety AU)
Fanfiction"Well, when you feel too many bad things at once, you just start to feel nothing at all." ---------- It was always the same. The same bench, the same time, the same overwhelming sense of emptiness in my chest. That was, up until he started show...