October 31
Patton hugged me when I walked through the door. I was a little caught off guard, glancing around in embarrassment, but I stilled hugged back. "Sorry," I told him, catching Roman's eye for a second as he stepped inside. "It was the party, I couldn't handle it. I'm okay now, though. Roman calmed me down." Roman smiled gratefully and Patton rushed over to thank him. That was my chance to leave. I kicked off my shoes and tried to reach the living room, but someone grabbed my arm. I looked behind me to see Roman frowning.
"You aren't leaving, are you?" he asked. I froze for a moment and slowly shook my head.
"Good," Patton asserted, pulling me away from Roman, "Because it's time for party games."
"Pat, no," I said. I started to freak out and tried to pull away, but he persisted. We were in the basement in no time.
Most people were still upstairs, so it was around 12 of us sitting in a circle. I had Roman on my left and Patton on my right, both giving me space, but still close enough that they could monitor me. It did bother me a little that they felt such a need to take care of me, but at the same time, it was reassuring to have that sort of support. Neither seemed to mind.
"Truth or dare? Really?" a girl across from me asked. I knew her from high school, but I couldn't remember her. It was possible her name was Amy, but it also might have been Kathy or Maya. "You guys are so cliche, seriously, we're adults."
"You don't like it, you can leave," some dude replied. Patton was mumbling about how he just wanted to have fun, and I sighed. "Trish, truth or dare?"
I started to zone out and look around the room. Somebody spilled a drink on the wall ghost, which seemed unlikely to be an accident. Who would deface a ghost? There was still a movie playing, something paranormal, but no one was watching it. My eyes wandered to Roman, who was smiling at something someone said. He glanced at me and our eyes met. For some reason, I instinctively looked away. My face heated up and I put all of my focus to the floor instead.
"Virge, truth or dare?" a guy named Mark asked. I took a deep breath and looked up at him.
"Truth," I said. I didn't sound as confident as I'd hoped I would.
"Why did your parents kick you out in high school?"
I sighed and rolled my eyes. I could see Patton trying to get my attention but I ignored him. "They didn't kick me out, I ran away."
"Okay, sure, but why?"
Patton stood up and clapped once. "Okay, no more games, this was wrong. I'm sorry," he said, frowning down at me guiltily. I stood up and smiled.
"No, this isn't on you," I said. "This party is great, really, they just aren't my people. I'm gonna go get some water."
Patton seemed happier after that, and he probably went back to the game, but I'm not sure because I was already upstairs.
----------
"Homophobic," I said. It wasn't a surprise that Roman would ask about my parents. It was a surprise that it would be so easy to tell him the truth. "I came out at like 13, and they said I was too young to know that stuff, so I pretended to be straight until I was 17. I couldn't take it anymore, so I came out again. They didn't take it lightly."
"Did they...?" he trailed off, picking at the shingles beside him. We were laying on the roof, staring up at the sky. I looked to my right to see his face, but he didn't look back at me, so I allowed my eyes to linger for a while.
"They never physically did anything, but they ignored me for days sometimes, and whenever sinners were brought up in church, they'd look at me. One time they actually stood up and asked for prayer to 'cure me.' I kept trying to convince them that I wasn't ill--they called it a mental illness, they kept trying to force me into therapy. It just built up, and... I left and moved in with my boyfriend. He was 19 so he had his own apartment."
"I'm so sorry." He finally looked at me, but I didn't feel the need to look away this time. "Is that why you're still...?"
I laughed slightly. "No, no. I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder when I was 4, and then Social Anxiety Disorder when I was 9."
"Ah."
I turned back towards the sky.
"Thank you."
"For what?" I asked. We looked at each other again.
"Telling me. I'm... happy that you trust me."
I smiled and sat up. "Where's this coming from? I mean, it's nice and all, but it doesn't seem like you to get sentimental out of nowhere."
"I'm dramatic."
"Trust me, I know."
"And maybe not the nicest."
"Sure."
"But you make me... better."
"What?"
He sat up so we were facing each other. "You make me better. Or, you make me want to be better. I don't know." He seemed uncomfortable, like admitting something like this was completely foreign.
I sighed and shook my head. "You don't need to be uneasy, you can tell me this stuff. You make me want to be better, too." We smiled at each other.
I swear something was about to happen. I may have imagined it, but he seemed to lean in, just slightly. His eyes were shining, and I wasn't sure what to do. Even worse, call it my inability to say no or some hidden desire, but I wasn't sure if I'd be able to reject him if he did try anything. Did we even have that kind of chemistry? No, there was no way. Neither of us had ever acted like we were interested. I leaned back and looked at the backyard. "Virgil, Roman, Patton's requested your appearance in the living room. Everyone else is gone." I was somewhat frozen in place, and for once I was completely relieved to hear Logan's voice. Roman seemed flustered and upset when I looked at him, rushing to climb back down the side of the house, and I followed a few feet behind him, trying not to trip over my shaking legs.
YOU ARE READING
Park Bench (Prinxiety AU)
Fanfiction"Well, when you feel too many bad things at once, you just start to feel nothing at all." ---------- It was always the same. The same bench, the same time, the same overwhelming sense of emptiness in my chest. That was, up until he started show...