Move on. Paano?

Pain Demands To Be Felt

Napanood nyo na ba yung Movie based on the book written by John Green?

Yes! Yung The Fault In Our Stars.

Grabe nakakaiyak yung story nila noh?

Pero we can see that their story was tragic because of forces beyond their control and it was more of a life and death situation for both of them.

Hindi dahil sa sinaktan sila ng taong mahal nila.

So lose yourself from the said story 'coz we are dealing with the reality.

Oo. Yung realidad na wala na kayo.

At ang sakit sakit non.

After the break up, you have a lot of days to face being in pain.

It may take days, weeks, months, years.

Depending on your coping mechanisms.

The moment you break up with the one you love, be ready for the pain you think you can't withstand.

Prepare yourself for sleepless nights, malalaking eyebags for crying so hard, yung pagkawala ng gana on different things, being too emotional, the feeling of grievance not because of death but of losing the one you love, and many other negative effects upon you.

The title speaks for itself.

Step Two is all about feeling the pain.

Magpakatotoo naman tayo guys.

Masakit itong pangyayaring ito.

And trying to pretend that everything's perfect won't help you.

Pride won't be of help to yourself at this very moment.

Yes.

Feel the pain.

Masaktan ka.

Tao ka lang, okay?

We are weak especially when we are in pain.

Tanggapin mo sa sarili mo na nasaktan ka.

Express it!

Iiyak mo ng iiyak hanggang sa wala ka ng luha na maiiyak dahil expressing it helps you endure the pain.

Sa paglalabas mo ng sakit na nadarama mo, you are somehow letting go of the pain.

Kahit papaano, nababawasan yung sakit na nararamdaman mo.

And by this way, mas nakabubuti dahil things will get clearer as your pain gets lesser.

Kase diba medyo biased pag strong yung emotional attachment natin sa isang bagay.

And how can you move on pag biased ang perception mo?

You have to be realistic and practical my dear.

So by going along the process, eventually you will be able to think at your best and understand things the right way.

*ANO ANG ISTORYA KO?*

The moment na dumating ako sa kwarto (naka boarding-house kase ako nun during college) I tried to smile to my room-mate.

Of course I didn't want to break down in front of them.

Though barkada ko yun room mate ko, I decided not to tell her first.

I went outside our room, and called my best friend (during college) and told her about everything that had happened.

Pero kase may mga tao din sa labas ng room that time and I didn't want them to hear about it, I decided to go back to our room.

As I continued conversing with my best friend on the other line, narinig ata nung roommate/barkada ko.

She stared at me in disbelief as I sat down beside her since she was sitting on my bed.

I looked at her and nodded in agreement, that what she heard was right.

She tapped my back, and feeling ko that was everything I needed.

After the phone call, she asked me why.

I tried to tell her the whole story, doing my best not to shed a tear in front of her.

But I just can't.

As I was telling her the details of our break-up, the pain just keep on panging my chest.

Nararamdaman ko yung same feeling , same pain I felt nung maghihiwalay na kami.

I bursted into tears.

I tried to hide my face from her by covering it with my hands.

Para din syang naiiyak.

Then she hugged me.

And she told me, "Okay lang yan. You did the right thing. This time, love yourself naman."

Yeah, she was right.

Sa sobra ng pagmamahal ko sa kanya, wala na yatang natira sa sarili ko.

Sa kanya lang kase umikot yung mundo ko.

Pati sarili ko, binalewala ko na for the sake of loving him.

Which is entirely wrong!!!

So ayun, iyak ako ng iyak.

Halos maya-maya ako naiyak whenever I have the moment to be with myself.

Yun lang kase ang lagi kong naiisip.

Yung break-up namin.

Dinama ko talaga yung pain.

Nagpakatotoo ako sa sarili ko at sa mga tao sa paligid ko.

But of course, dapat may follow up encouragement from yourself na "Kaya ko din to!"

Paano ka kase ma-eencourage kung ikaw mismo hindi mo ini-encourage yung sarili mo diba?

So ayun, ang haggard-haggard ko.

Halata talaga na may pinagdadaanan but I didn't mind.

Kase I believe na darating din ang araw na magiging okay ako.

At ngingiti ako dahil nakamove-on na ako.

At magpapasalamat ako dahil nangyari ang lahat ng ito. :)