Initium novum [Completed - being edited/rewritten]

Chapter 41

The other day, I woke up early. I moved quietly around the room, for I didn't want to wake up Valeria. I took the clothes on, took the box with letters from my mother and a blanket which I put around me and slowly and quietly went downstairs. When I was downstairs I went straight outside the house.

As I stepped outside the main door, I immediately felt that taking the blanked was very good idea, since it was very cold morning. Guards who were standing guard outside noticed me right away and asked me what I was doing outside. I told them that I just wanted to be on a fresh air so they left me alone. When they left I walked through the garden.

It was so quiet out there, since the sun didn't come out from its hiding, from behind the horizon, nothing was awake. I was walking in almost darkness, only thing which I heard were my steps.

I was headed to the bazebo, it was the only place in the garden in which there was a light. As I got under its roof, I sat on a bench, put the box with letters on a table and looked into a darkness in front of me

"I found it mom, Now, I will make sure its done all as it is supposed to be."

"Yes, you did. And I am so proud of you." Said a figure coming to me from the darkness. "I am so proud of you."

"Mom?" I asked as I was trying to see the face of the figure coming to me. "How did you...? You know, what don't tell me how did you get here. It would either end up by me laying here unconscious or something like that. Let's just talk since we have the opportunity, shall we?"

"Of course," she said and took a seat next to me on the bench.

On the table thre was the box with letters. We were both looking at it, waiting for the other one to do something with it.

"I see you found them, the letters... Ehm, have you read any of them yet?"

"I have," I said. "I have read the in which I did my first steps and also the one in which you wrote before your death."

On mother's face was a smile a I told her about the first letter. "Yes, your first steps. I remember it as if it was yesterday. I would change everything in the world to be with you again, to be a mother you did not have," she said.

"I know mom," I said, "but even though you had not a chance to raise me yourself, you had ensured me a great life. Thanks to you, I had a chance to become a person I am now. I found love. I found everything I have only thanks to you and your decision,"

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yes mother, I am sure."

Astrid looked surprised by my answer. "I thought you would hate me, especially after learning the truth."

"I won't lie, I have hated you." I said. "More then ever, I hated you after Adrius died. I wished I was never born, so he could live. But. Now I understand, I understand everything and I know that this was what Adrius wanted all along. He wanted me to find the out who I really am. He did it, even though he knew he will die doing so. He made the ultimate sacrifice for a child he loved, as well as you did when you gave me away. For that I will always honour you.

"My child, he would be so proud of you. As well as I am."

"I know, and I promise you that Markus Lucius will pay for what he did to both of you. I will make sure he gets what he deserves."

Astrid's look changed. She turned her face to the darkness. Staring at it, she said "What do you want to do? You don't want to kill him, do you?"

"Yes, mother. That is exactly what I want to do. Because that is what he deserves for what he did. He is a monster, not a man, not my father, just a monster."