Loud Mind [poetry]

My silent screams

No one knows
what goes on
in my mind
day and night,
how the monster
in my head
doesn't let me
out of it's sight.
How it controls
my every move
destroying proof
of my sanity,
the monster
called anxiety.

Full of fear,
wanting to disappear,
to be invisible like a ghost
no one can see or hear.
Clinging to books
desperately hoping
they'll explain the things
that I couldn't about me.
Surrounded by many
but still feeling lonely.

Trying to act normal
when I'm falling apart,
my suffocating thoughts
weighing down on my heart.
I can't let people know
how much I'm suffering.
I can't show anyone
my wounds that always sting.

My every breath is a battle
and I won't let you go down with me.
Because my misery
doesn't love company.