Te Extraño

2~ Empty Wallets

Living our lives, dancing on empty wallets

“What are we even gonna do? She won’t understand...” Calum mumbled, still in a panicked state.

Ashton sighed and snaked his arms around Calum, pulling him closer.

“I don’t know,” he whispered.

“Daddy?” Joy whispered, sitting up slightly.

“Oh, Joy, my baby.” Calum breathed out, taking her hand in his. “How do you feel?”

“My chest hurts,” Joy whispered.

Ashton gently rubbed Joy’s shoulder, smiling sympathetically.

“Daddy what’s wrong with me?” Joy whispered, looking at Calum with pleading yet curious eyes.

Ashton locked eyes with Calum, giving him a look of you need to tell her.

Calum sighed sadly, swallowing thickly before clearing his throat. Ashton could see the painful look on Calum's face, having to tell their daughter she had a terminal disease. What do you even do with that information? Getting told that you may only have a few more months to live or spend up to years having some medicine pumped into you that'll make you feel like shit? What do you do?

"You remember how I said my mum died before you were born?" Calum whispered, his eyes watering.

Joy nods softly.

"It was from lung cancer. It's a sickness that grows inside you and a lot of people don't make it. Y- You have it too. But we're gonna help you through this, okay? We're not going to leave your side at all." Calum mumbled.

"How did this happen?" Joy asked. "Don't you get that from smoking like on tv?"

"Actually, it's because of m-"

"Sometimes it just happens," Ashton butts in. "It sucks, but unfortunately it just happens."

Joy nods softly, staring at her lap. Ashton leans over and gives Calum's hand a soft squeeze.

Calum falls silent, but from the look on his face, Ashton could tell he was thinking hard about something.

"So what do I do?" Joy asked.

"Well it's your choice. You can either take the medicine, which is called chemotherapy, or not. Now, chemo is very intense, alright? You'll get very sick but it's for a good cause, yeah? If it works, all of this will go away."

"What if I don't do that?"

Ashton sighed, holding back a sob.

"You'll die."

Joy's eyes widened. "Daddy, I don't want to die! I wanna stay with you! Don't let them let me die!"

That's when Ashton broke down again, tears falling freely from his face as he hugged Joy closely, not letting her go. Calum too, joined the hug, crying. This all happened so quickly. He couldn't believe, that in a few short years, he may not have a daughter. Just a son. Knowing his luck, he'd probably pass this on to Michael as well. Fuck, it was all his fault. First his mum, now his daughter. Who else was he gonna kill?

What felt like hours later, Calum and Ashton pulled away from their now sleeping daughter.

"How are we gonna pay for this?" Calum mumbled, rubbing his forehead.

"Really? That's your concern? The cost? Who cares how much it costs? We have to find the money or we're gonna lose our daughter!" Ashton spat.

"You think I don't know that? I'm just saying, you haven't been able to keep a job for years because of your so-called trauma so I've been the only one working! It's hard enough working 7 am to 11 pm when you can barely afford to pay off the house, all while paying for the kids to go to school, clothes on your back and food in your stomach! I don't know where we're going to get the money! We can't even afford health insurance!"

"Don't. Don't bring my job into this. You have no idea how hard that was!” Ashton yelled, defensively.

“You went to therapy! It happened fourteen years ago for fucks sake!” Calum shot back.

“He was shot right in front of me, Calum! Luke killed him RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!” Ashton screamed.

That’s it. They knew they were going to be kicked out now.

“It was fourteen years ago, Ashton. You have to get over it. You weren’t even together.” Calum spat.

Ashton stood up, beyond furious.

“THAT’S THE WORST PART, CALUM! MY LAST CONVERSATION WITH HIM WAS A FIGHT. THE LAST WORDS HE HEARD ME SAY WAS ‘FUCK OFF MICHAEL. DON’T COME BACK.’ HOW DO YOU THINK THAT FEELS? IF I DIDN’T BREAK UP WITH HIM, HE WOULDN’T OF WANDERED OFF AND GOT STUCK WITH LUKE! He wouldn’t of gotten shot.”

“If you didn’t break up with him, we wouldn’t of ended up together.” Calum whispered.

“Well right now, that feels like a good thing.” Ashton spat, sitting back down and glaring hard at Calum. If looks could kill, Calum would certainly be six feet under.

“You don’t mean that,” Calum breathed, looking at Ashton with wide eyes.

Ashton stayed silent.

“Is everything alright in here? You guys need to lower your voices, please. Have some respect for other patients and their families.”

Ashton’s head snapped to the male nurse standing in their doorway, looking extremely tired and agitated.

“Yeah, sorry. Stressful times.” Ashton mumbled.

“Okay, well please keep your voices down. Another outburst and we’ll need to kick the both of you out.” The nurse said before leaving.

Ashton pulled out his phone, scrolling through Instagram. Calum, however sat still, with his head hanging low. Tears were dripping down from his face onto his lap. He’d been sitting on his hands for so long, they were going numb. His heart ached. Ashton didn’t mean what he said, did he?

Doubts were running through Calum’s mind, trampling every positive thought about their relationship. How long had Ashton felt like this? Was it just a heat of the moment thing? Had Ashton felt this way ever since Michael died? Did he regret everything?

Maybe it was all a lie.