Halloween Party // l.h

13

I began to stir awake, I rolled over in my bed on to more empty mattress beside me, quickly becoming aware that I was alone. I wasn't expecting such an emptiness in my sheets, I was expecting Luke.

Luke.

I sat up slowly and opened my eyes, he's gone. He wouldn't of left, he wouldn't do that.

I swung my legs over the side of my bed and stood up. His clothes were no where to be seen on my bedroom floor. I strongly remember stripping them from his body last night and throwing them somewhere around here.

I walked out of my bedroom, hopeful to find him in the kitchen or sitting on my lounge, but to my disappointment he wasn't. I walked towards my bathroom, the door was slighlty ajar. I knocked gently on the door, but gained no response. I stepped inside the small bathroom and he wasn't in there either. I expected him to be in here, after all it was the last place he could possibly be, unless he left.

He left.

The realization washed over me and hit me like a tidal wave.

I walked out of the bathroom and slowly sat down on the lounge.I feel hurt, of course I'm disappointed, he just left, like he doesn't care.

I slouched down into the cushioned seat of my lounge and ran my fingers through my hair. I can't believe I was so stupid, I actually thought last night was something special, but it was just an insignificant hook up for him.

He didn't even leave an explanation as to why he left. He just left, like I was nothing. He couldn't even wait till I was awake to say goodbye that's how meaningless I am to him.

I feel like an idiot, so naive and used.

Something caught my eye, it was a blue mask lying on the carpet near my feet. I picked up the Leonardo mask and held it carefully in my fingers, he had left it behind, I felt the fabric and started thinking back to last night. It's like my memories went into high speed recap, and I started to feel every emotion that I felt from the moment I met him. Intrigue, confusion, happiness, flirtatiousness, surprise, admiration, attraction, pleasure, satisfaction, and then for that to all go away and become overwhelmed with anger, sadness and this disappointed pathetic feeling in the pit of my stomach.

All in the short amount of time I had known him, I developed feelings towards him and then fell for him. I never believed that you could feel so strongly in such a short time, but he proved me wrong. He made me fall for him and now it's all gone and wasted because he clearly doesn't feel the same.

I feel so stupid, just because I liked him, didn't mean I should of slept with him. I was sure I wasn't going to regret last night, but now, I have never regretted anything more. I hate myself for not thinking things over better.

Why do I always let myself get hurt so easily?

My eyes stayed locked on the mask like I couldn't look away, this mask is just a sad, pathetic reminder of him, I scrunched it up in anger and threw it to the ground. I'm angry with myself for believing that what we had was real, and I'm even angrier at Luke for leading me to believe it all so strongly, strongly enough that I slept with him. As the anger, self hatred and sadness built up inside me, I had to blink back a few tears and convince myself he isn't worth crying over. I've been hurt too many times to left something like this cut so deep, I'm going to be strong about this.

If I ever see him again, I'm going to be so angry, i'll probably yell and cause a big scene to publicly humiliate him. I know other girls will sleep with a guy as soon as they start to feel the slightest attraction, but lets clarify that I am not one of those girls. It was something about Luke that made me crazy and just forget everything I stand for, I'm angry he took advantage of that. I let a few tears slip from my eyes before quickly wiping them away, I can't cry over this.

I took some deep breaths and in my head convinced myself that it's nothing to get worked up about and to just forget him.

But I can't forget him, well not as easily as he forgot me.

The sound of someone knocking on my door startled me, my mind considered the possibility of it being Luke, but he can't get back into the building unless I buzz him in. As I walked to the door I adjusted myself to look half decent. I pressed myself against the wooden, apartment door and looked through the hole to see who it was.

I gasped slightly and stepped back from the door, it's Luke. How did he manage to get back in? damn neighbors.

" Lexie?" I heard his voice ask.

" Go away," I told him sternly.

" I get that your probably upset that I left, but I'm back now so please open the door," He pleaded.

" I said go away!" I said with my voice raised slightly, I sound like a child. I'm hoping that he doesn't realize the door is unlocked and he could enter at any second.

" Lexie..." He sighed my name.

I didn't know what to do, my morals tell me not to let him back in, but something tells me that he deserves a chance to explain.

I took in a deep breathe and stepped closer to my door, I know he is on the other side, it's up to me to make this decision.

I placed my hand on the handle, turned it and opened the door. He stumbled forward awkwardly, I think he was leaning on the door as I opened it.

He straightened up and then his eyes met with mine. I remained still in the doorway blocking him from entering my home.

" Why did you come back?" I questioned him.

" I didn't even get out of the building, I realized that I'm a complete idiot for leaving like I did," He replied sincerely. I should slam this door in his face, but I can't shut him out when something inside me wants him so desperately.

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a/n

IT'S BACK READERS!

I know I was on hold for a while (ok maybe like forever) I had some writers block and other stuff going on, but now I'm committed to this story!

vote and comment :)

- lexie xx