goodnight | junhao au

26.

2 am.

The clock on Junhui's nightstand showed 2 am. He just woke up, after sleeping peacefully for a few hours.

They had a lot of fun with Mingyu and Wonwoo, who stayed over for dinner, and watched a movie with them. He was so happy because his bestfriend finally got to be with the one he was so in love with.

His night couldn't be better. But still he woke up to the one sound that made him overly worried. The silent sobs of Xu Minghao.

Junhui still didn't know what made him this sad. What kept him awake at night, crying his heart out. The things that woke him up out of his sleep. But he had to give him the time to talk about it. Because he could see the pain in Minghao's eyes and he knew it was for the best if he gave him the time to take it easy and eventually talk to him about it.

But for now, it was for the best if he went to him. Knowing how much it helped him fall asleep peacefully the time before. He couldn't bare to let Minghao do it all alone because Junhui knew he might not be able to do it all himself. So he needed to help him and be there.

Determined he got up from his bed and sneaked to his bedroom door, staying there for a while to listen how he came closer to the sobs. He opened the door and looked trough their living room. Minghao wasn't there to be seen. He must've stayed in his bedroom this night. 

Junhui sneaked over to Minghao's room and opened the door, doubting if he should knock at first. He peeked inside and saw Minghao's figure shooting straight and panicking a bit. 

"J-Junhui.. h-hey.! C-couldn't y..you sl..l..leep?" 

Worried, he walked over to Minghao's side of the bed and he sat down on the edge, looking him straight in his eyes. His face was covered in tears and trough the darkness he could still see his swollen eyes clearly. Not even to start about his uncontrollable breathing. 

"Minghao, what's going on?" 

The two just stared at each other for a moment. Maybe Junhui was too early with asking it, but he couldn't help but to worry so incredibly much. How couldn't he, when he saw Minghao like this. Of course he wanted to know what was going on so he could give the younger the comfort he needed. 

"Junhui.. I.. I.."

But he couldn't bring out  more, because his words got interrupted by another load of sobs. And he broke down again. This time not even able to keep himself up, so he just dropped himself to the front. Only to be catched up by Junhui.  

Junhui, instead, moved a bit forward, so Minghao's body could rest comfortably against his. Which still wasn't a very comfortable position, since Minghao had to lean all the way forward to actually hug him back. 

"Let me just.." Junhui climbed over Minghao's body to sit next to him, laying down a little bit. Minghao automatically layed back and rested his head on Junhui's chest, right under his chin, gripping onto him tightly. 

The speed of Junhui's heart didn't slow down. For once, not because of the position they were in. It was because he was so scared of the sudden actions. What happened to him that made him feel like this?

"It's okay... I'm here for you.. You're safe.... It's going to be okay.." 

He wrapped his arms around the shaking boy, slowly stroking his hair and whispering reassuring things to calm him down. It took him a while, but eventually it worked. Minghao's breath started to get steady again and his body would stop shaking. The sobs stopped exiting his mouth and the tears stopped streaming down his face like a waterfall. 

Junhui moved his hand a little to wipe away all the remaining tears. He gently cupped his face and wiped them away in a circling movement with his thumb, which seemed to relax Minghao even more. 

"Minghao.. Can you maybe, tell me what's going on? I know you might be scared to tell me, but I'm so worried about you." Junhui looked at Minghao, eyes filled with honesty. Maybe it was too early to ask him, but he couldn't help it. Seeing him this vulnerable and broken like this only made Junhui wanted to take full care of him. He wanted to be there for him..

Minghao looked up, staring back straight in the eyes of Junhui. 

For the first time in his life he had the feeling he could trust someone. Trust someone with all the problems he's been taking together with him for his whole life. Junhui's eyes spoke pure honesty. The way his voice lowered when he comforted Minghao. The way he held him tightly and close to him, arms going all the way around his body, stroking trough his hair, the warmth that radiated off his body. 

Even the way he smelled calmed him down. As if whenever he sniffed Junhui's scent, he came home. Because that's what it felt like to Minghao. Junhui was his home. His place to go to. 

Of course he knew Junhui might never return his feelings for him, but he could still trust him as a friend, he was extremely in love with. 

But he just couldn't keep it inside anymore, his past was tearing him apart. Because he never felt like he could talk to anyone about this, until he met Junhui. His first love, the first person in his life who showed him he was there for him no matter what, the first one who was trustworthy. Maybe even THE one..

And he decided that it would be for the best. To finally starting to get better instead instead of keeping it to himself and crying himself to sleep every night. Because he was done. Done with all the scars his dad gave him. The pain was too much to handle and it was time for him to let go...

"Y-you promised me to not leave me.. right?"

Junhui chuckled deeply and wiped a stray of hair out of his face. "Of course I won't leave you."

Minghao let out a deep sigh and rested his head on Junhui's chest again, going up and down in a steady pace. The right moment had come.. And so he started telling Junhui his story.