Dear Meggie

January 8th, 2013

January 8th, 2013

 

Dear Meggie,

With all your grieving over Will, you’ve stopped coming to school. The one day you even came close, you told me, “Can you ditch with me today? I don’t want to be alone.” But I couldn’t do it, Meggie. You don’t understand the guilt I feel at Will’s death. And the guilt I feel that I chose a boy over my best friend.

So for the last few days, I’ve gone to school, without you. And, surprisingly enough, so has Sarah, Kelly, and Matt.

Well, all up until today.

Today was a rainy day. I pulled my jacket close to my body as I walked up to the school, my messy hair matting to my cheeks. When I exhaled, white mist poured out from my mouth to the space in front of me. Then, suddenly, it began to pour.

This was extremely inconvenient to me, for I was only mere steps from reaching the door, and this sudden intake of icy cold water dripping down my body gave me quite a shock.

I sighed, and turned around, not sure what exactly I was hoping to see. But in that pouring rain, I saw you, walking at full speed towards me, cursing at the rain beneath your breath. Then you saw me, and stopped, suddenly.

I brought up my hand, and slightly waved at you, giving you a half smile. You smiled back, and sped up to me and hugged me.

“I’m sorry for ditching school so much,” you said. “It’s just, Will-”

“Shh, Meggie,” I said. “You shouldn’t be sorry. Will meant as much to me as he did to you.”

And you began to sob, and the icy rain fell onto both of us, and I cried, silently, with you. But I knew what I’d done, and I just couldn’t imagine how you’d feel if you knew all that had happened between us. I had betrayed my best friend.

I just hope we can still be friends when you finally do find out.

Love, Harriett