before you / jung jaehyun

twelve

[ 20th march 2018, 8:32pm ]

it's been 4 days since mark and aeri broke up. jaehyun finally proved himself and his theory right. that mark lee, has the kind of evil that wont go away.

aeri's phone was ringing for the 18th time today. she looked at her phone screen, Mark. she rolled her eyes and threw her phone onto the floor. she hated herself for thinking that mark could actually change.

she thought mark wouldve changed for the better, that he would prove himself worthy of a second chance. was it so hard to just- mean an apology?

[ 16th march 2018  ]

"what the fuck?!" aeri yelled out in shock, but also mostly in anger. jaehyun standing right next to her, by the tone of her words, he knew that she was more angry than sad.

mark pushed yena away from him. the girl that mark lee just kissed stared aeri up and down, then smirked. aeri knew what she was doing. yena was only purposely doing that to make her angry. but why?

seconds later, jiyeon skipped over, judging by her outfit, she just finished class. she went over to yena and called her out. "oh? yena! youre here already? i told you to wait for me inside!" she giggled, so did yena.

jiyeon glared at her ex bestfriend, and then back to jaehyun. she let out a scoff. putting her arms around yena's shoulder, she said, "come on! we need to try the new coffee thats on the menu," and then they both strolled into the cafe.

ah, aeri thought to herself. now it all made sense.

yena and jiyeon had a plan, remember? that plan was to make aeri and mark break up. by using his ex girlfriend, the one that he cheated on aeri with. it was like aeri was back to square one. when she made eye contact with mark, all he could do was stand there, he scratched the back of his head. because he knew what he did was wrong.

"we're over," was all aeri could say. there was a lot to process. she just wanted to run back home and cry her eyes out. in fact, she just wanted to bawl right there and then. but she had to put up a strong front. it looked like she wasnt hurt, but deep inside her heart, the bandages that were helping to reattach old wounds were already torn apart.

yes, her heart was back to square one.

mark stood there in silence. jaehyun scoffed. "same old mark lee, huh?" jaehyun muttered, before grabbing aeri by her wrists and dragging her into the cafe. his break was about to end anyways.

[ PRESENT ]

aeri needed to get out of her room. she locked herself in there for so long, sometimes jaehyun swings by to surprise her with special drinks that he came up with while hes on lunch break. he was the only boy that aeri wanted to see.

jaehyun was the only boy that aeri looked forward to see, despite being in a tragic state.

she grabbed her hoodie and decided to leave her house, she went for a walk in the park. it was a cold night. it wasnt winter or anything, just - cold. after strolling for about 10 minutes, admiring the trees and the stray cats and dogs, she decided to sit on a random park bench.

couples were everywhere. either that, or there were many elderly feeding the ducks by the pond. she just sat there and let the cold embrace her. of course, in an empty state like that, her mind would start to reminisce, who else other than mark lee?

aeri sat on the bench, reminiscing about all the times she spent with mark. sometimes she would let out a little smile, here and there. people walking by would think she was crazy. but she wasnt. she just missed the boy.

and like as if she was in a romance movie, she felt as if she heard his voice in real life. her heart stopped thumping for a moment, before realizing that the boy she was thinking about was right behind her.

there stood mark lee, eyes and nose red, cheeks puffy. his hair messy and in a hoodie as well. "can we talk?" was all that came out from his mouth. aeri just nodded her head. she was too tired to run away from him. how much longer can she run away? it had to stop soon. nows the time.

mark just slowly walked over to her and sat right next to her. there was a space in between them. a space that would make passerby-s think they were strangers. well, they kind of are, right?

of course, there was a moment of awkward silence. nobody talked. just them breathing and their heartbeats thumping to different beats. they werent one, anymore. they're two different people now.

"she kissed me," mark admitted. aeri just sighed, "yea, and you let her," she justified herself. she knew that yena and mark were both to blame. although it was so hard for her to think of mark as a bad person. she knew that mark was to be blamed this time round too.

"what is it about her? do you still think about her? dream of her?" aeri asked out of the blue. she looked at her ex boyfriend in the eye. mark just sat there shocked, his eyes widened. and then he let out a soft chuckle. "are you kidding me? of course i dont! aeri, i loved you," he raised his voice a little louder.

loved.

"mark, you dont hurt people you love! clearly you still have a thing for her, why else would you kiss her and then stand there quiet when i call you out on your bullshit?" she rolled her eyes. she didnt want to argue, but it felt like they were heading for that path. she knew that she would cry if they started fighting.

"i fucking trusted you! you made me feel so safe in your arms. you made me feel so fucking safe. and then you go do shit like that behind my back? you dont do that shit to people you 'love' mark. you just dont!" aeri frustratedly exclaimed.

mark just kept quiet.

"what am i supposed to do now? i lost my bestfriend, and now i lost the one boy i love. when i need somebody to talk to, where do i freaking go to? mark, you are that one person that i look forward to seeing at the end of each bloody day,"

"now i just feel like im lost. i dont know what to do, where to go. and i hate you for messing everything up. i hate you so much for making me feel like your apology was sincere. i hate you for making me feel as if you deserved a second chance,"

she ran her fingers through her hair frustratedly. there it was. the tears. finally. they were falling. her heart was broken and now the tears cant stop falling. her throat swelled up. it felt like she couldnt even breathe any more oxygen.

she had so much more things to say, but she couldnt even bring herself to say it. they werent together anymore. if they were, mark wouldve pulled her close and bring her into his embrace. but now they're just strangers with very fond memories of each other.

"and i hate you because after all this, i still love you. and you're bad for my health, but i still love you," aeri confessed. "jaehyun was right," mark finally spoke after keeping quiet for so long. aeri looked at him, confused as to what he was trying to say.

"aeri, im still the same old mark lee that hurt you years ago. i never changed. i thought i did, when i saw you. i believed i did. but i still hurt you. not just once, but multiple times," he explained himself. she was still confused.

"i wanted to be the one who makes you happy, so bad. i really tried, but i kept fucking it up. i dont deserve you. and you dont deserve me. we both dont deserve each other. we're bad for each other," he continued to speak.

"but i feel like the next one you fall in love with, will be the one that deserves you. but that person wont be me," he looked into her eyes. and for the first time in forever, aeri felt as if mark was being sincere, after a long history of deceiving her.