Disney [RANTS]

why i'll never date celebrities // I WANNA RANT SO IM GONNA RANT

OKAY GUYS IM ANGRY

IVE BEEN REALLY OBSSESSED WITH ONCE UPON A TIME LATELY AND IM ON THE THIRD SEASON AND I AM REAL MAD.

AND PETER PAN

IF YOU HAVE'NT READ MY OTHER RANT BOOK, 'BUBBLEGUM BITCH'  THERES A RANT CALLED HOTTIES

AND IM HERE TO MAKE A

NEW

AND

IMPROVED

LIST

1) they don't know i exist

but i swear were soul mates please love me 

maybe this is why im alone

2) you don't know how to talk to them

like are you kIDING ME

i can talk to hot people all day long but hOT PEOPLE I LIKE

oh no hun i'd like cry in the middle of asking them how their day was.

3) they're so much older

hey hey hey

ian somerhalder's pretty hot i wonder if i would have cha-

WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S IN HIS 30S

4) their in a relationship

u know what ur gonna come cryin to me whenever they break ur heart bC IM YOUR SOUL MATE

5) you look like a potato standing next to them

u know what this isn't fair.

i will sell myself to satan in order to not look like a potato but peter pan just wakes up and could throw up five pairs of granny panties and only wear a traashbag bUT HE'S HOTTER THAN ME I DON'T UNDERSTAND,

6) they would think your a crazy stalker

even if i didn't look like a potato, we could be in a relationship without breaking the law and they wouldn't be in their 50s by then

WE WOULD ALL BE STALKERS

you could be on a date and they could be telling you about themselves and you'd be thinking, "know that, know that, know that, ooOH I'VE NEVER HEARD THAT BEFORE MUST ALERT THE FANDOM."

and then you'd go home and blog about your date dON'T LIE

7) (this one only counts if their an actor or something)

you could never watch your favorite tv/movie with them if they star in it.

DO YOU KNOW HOW AWKWARD THAT WOULD BE

like they could've done something amazing and you'd be fangirling like, "OOH YEAH WORK THAT SWORD." and then you'd realize they're sitting next to you and you'd cry b/c tHEIR SO FAB

8) you look at them and cry

i mean come on. i can look at a photo of my celebrity crush and break out into tears beCAUSE I MEAN THEIR A GOD

but that would be sorta hard to do in a relationship aye

9) you could never read fanfiction

that'd be awkward

expecially with smut

because i always leave my laptop open all the way whenever i go get something

tHEY COULD COME OVER AND READ WHAT IM READING AND I WOULD BE SO AFRAID LIKE I'D CRY OK

(i use to write fanfiction and my mom asked what i was doing and she had to read what i was writing vOTE IF U CRY EVERY TIME)

10) and most of all

they'd probably end up hating us

i mean we'd be so obsessive don't lie

you may think your perfect husband/wife/partner material but you would be sO CLINGY

i would too don't be ashamed

beacuse they are tOO HOT

and you have loved them YEARS BEFORE THEY KNEW YOU

and you would never be able to handle if it they had to kiss someone on set for a tv id break down into tears man

(the gif on the side is of peter pan, who is my nEW CELEBRITY CRUSH HOLD ME)