I'm wondering how I'm going to get away from Garda Girle when she's offered a date night of her own. The handsome guard from upstairs waltzes in during dinner, with an armful of Snickers and two rare red Powerades and asks if he can steal her away.
"This is part of it," Shiv whispers, "He's in Chet's pocket!"
"The guard is?"
"My man's promised to tattoo him when he gets out," Tangler explains. "They're sort of friends. The guard wants his whole back done, big portrait of Girdle I imagine. Shit like that's way too expensive on a guard's salary – a whole back? In color? Could be four or five grand, easily – but Chet'll do it for free. They're buddies. Steak must have asked him for a favor: get Girdle out of the way so he can meet you."
"Wait, you guys have guards in your pockets?"
"Sure, some of us do," says Shiv. "You forget, their lives are just as miserable as ours. They're stuck in here every day, too, only difference is they're on the other side of the bars. But we've got the same view, eat the same food, listen to the same petty drama day in and day out. They've even got uniforms, too! No one wants to be a jail garda, they get bored just as easily as we do. Some'll bring drugs in, contraband snacks, tools – whatever you want if you've got something to offer them in return."
"Like tattooing?"
"Sure," Tangler shrugs. "We've got stuff they want. The girls in here for running drugs? They've got access to the good shit. You get a guard who wants to do some cocaine, if he brings it in for one us, he can have a taste of something way better than he could ever afford on his own. Same if someone's in here for like, counterfeit goods or stolen streetwear or laundering money. Guards want in on those things, too. They do favors for us and they get to skim off the top."
Garda Girdle accepts the Powerade, giggling and blushing, and allows the guard to take her hand and lead her upstairs. Before their footsteps have died in the hall above us, Shiv and I rush off towards the library.
YOU ARE READING
Only the Moon Watching
RomanceEighteen-year-old Josephina's first day in jail feels like a joke. Her guard's name is Garda Girdle, like she's in a detective novel; the hottest guy (and hottest bit of gossip) is named Steak; her roommate, Shiv, introduces her to the weirdest matc...