Don't Be Afraid. I Feel It, Too | Kylo Ren x reader

Chapter 5: Resistance

I wake up the next morning and see Kylo sitting on the side of the bed. I don't remember him sleeping with me. I look over and see that he is upset and he is holding his face in his hands.

"Kylo..?" I ask quietly, not wanting to make him angry.

"I killed him... I killed him..." he says repeating himself over and over again.

"Killed who..?" I ask.

"My... my father..." he says quietly, almost a whisper. "He tried to turn me to the light side. He tried to take me...."

"Kylo..." I put my hand on his back and rub it gently, "It's okay, everything will be okay."

"No!" He exclaims getting up from the bed, "There's something wrong with me. I'm a monster..."

"No, Kylo..."

"I'm a monster, why are you still here?" He pauses and looks at me, "I'm a monster, you're marrying a monster..."

"You're not a monster, Kylo." I stand up and walk towards him.

"You're crazy, marrying a mons-"

Before he can say anymore, I give him a hug, I feel him hug me back and we stay like that. I hear gentle and quiet sobs coming from him. He doesn't want to show how weak he can really be. I know what it's like to have bottled up emotions. Specially when talking with Leia, I've always sensed the dark side but I'm tried to push it out of the way.

"I..." Kylo says grouch tears.

"What's wrong Kylo?"

"I killed my father..." he says, "The screams of that Wookiee and Jedi made me feel better. He was the only tie to the light side. Now I have no connection to the light side."

"Yes, Kylo..." I say trying to make him feel better.

We stand there in a hug for a few minutes when the doors to his quarters open.

"No." He says, "Don't leave me."

"I wasn't planning to."

"Ren!" I hear General Hux exclaim from the living area of Kylo's quarters, "Where are you?"

"Don't answer, I'd bore him." Kylo says, although it was more like an order.

I hear General Hux make his way into Kylo's room, "Oh, sorry..."

"What do you want? Hux." Kylo says, he doesn't have his mask on.

"I just, I was thinking that we move (Y/n) into different quarters." General Hux explains.

Suddenly Kylo lets go and turns around quickly, "No, she's not leaving."

"But, wouldn't it be better?"

"No."

"Where does miss (L/n) sleep?"

"I'm my room."

"Yes, what about you, Ren?"

"Wherever I want to, I sleep in the living room, my bed, I can sleep in the fucking bathroom if I wanted to." He says angrily to Hux.

"Okay..." General Hux turns on his heel, "I feel bad for you (Y/n)."

"Why?" I ask him.

"You were supposed to meet me on the bridge 10 minutes ago, that is why I'm here." He says, "Ren should have told you."

I start to project to Kylo.

Tell him I was upset.

Why? Why not tell him you were comforting me.